WIZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!11!!!!!!!!!!!!!!one!!!11!oneone!!1eleven

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WIZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!11!!!!!!!!!!!!!!one!!!11!oneone!!1eleven

Post by DorianCreed on Sun Mar 03, 2013 12:46 am

[21:52] <@Spiritcurse> After a long and perilous journey from your individual countries of origin, and a short yet no less perilous journey across the skyways of Sharn, you find yourself before a large iron gate studded with crystals. Above it, a massive sign. "Morgrave University". Your home for the next few years, and arguably the most dangerous place outside the Mournlands.
[21:52] <@Spiritcurse> Beyond the gate, an elderly wizard is giving directions to all that ask, while a carving of a mouth occasionally broadcasts announcements to all present. The gate, contrary to previous implications, is actually ajar.
[21:56] <@Spiritcurse> Noticing your laziness, the mage opens the gate and walks to you. "Who are you then, young sirs and/or madams?"
[21:56] <Codex> I set off walking through the intimidating gates towards the man giving directions.
[21:58] <@Spiritcurse> "Well, don't just stand there! We've got an outbreak from Shavarath upstairs! Who the devil are you?"
[21:59] <Dorian> I roll my shoulders, adjust my outift, and head off towards the man. "Saral Misra, sorcerer in training."
[21:59] <@Spiritcurse> "Welcome aboard! I take it you're a first year?"
[22:00] <Dorian> "Probably."
[22:00] <Dark> Perhaps one of the stranger sights present, is a small Teddy Bear standing alone and looking from side to side in silence
[22:00] <@Spiritcurse> "Good enough! And the rest of you?"
[22:00] <GC> "Hoenheim. Pleasure to meet you"
[22:01] <Furious> I ignore the mage and walk through the gates.
[22:02] <@Spiritcurse> "Right, well, do I have an entrance exam for you!"
[22:02] <Codex> "Penny Topher, Sir." I say, extending a hand. "Looking for the Artifice, err, initiation."
[22:02] <Dark> Mute, the artifical eyes of the bear reflect all it looks at before it starts to walk towards the gate
[22:02] <@Spiritcurse> "Artificer? Well, since the Clarke's Third Legislation, artificers have to register at the arcane school."
[22:04] <@Spiritcurse> There is a small explosion from the other side of the campus, and the mouth carving speaks. "If you are here for revenge, please wait while we send waves of progressively stronger magi to stop you.", which is shortly followed by the sounds of battle.
[22:04] <Codex> "Can you point me in the right direct--"
[22:04] <Codex> "Is that meant to happen?"
[22:04] <@Spiritcurse> "Just... just ignore that. It happens every couple days. Think of it like a fire alarm test."
[22:04] <Dorian> "Well."
[22:05] <@Spiritcurse> "Anyway. Due to there being too many first year applications, our entrance exam hall being on fire, and there being a vampire prowling the sewers... we have a new entrance exam!"
[22:05] <Dark> "...."
[22:06] <GC> "Go on..."
[22:06] <Dorian> "What do we have to do?"
[22:06] <@Spiritcurse> "Surely you see where I'm going with this?"
[22:06] <GC> "so.... we have to kill some first years?"
[22:07] <Dorian> "You want me to put out the entrance hall?"
[22:07] <Dorian> "And that?"
[22:07] <Codex> "We need to become Vampires?"
[22:07] <Dorian> "This is sounding better by the minute."
[22:07] <Furious> I look around for a manhole cover
[22:07] <@Spiritcurse> "We'd rather have the vampire's head on a spike. Go, my minions, go!" The mage cackles, and you think you see stormclouds gather above him for a second.
[22:07] <Dorian> "Goddamn it."
[22:08] <GC> "..."
[22:08] <Furious> I continue to look for a manhole cover
[22:08] <@Spiritcurse> You see a manhole cover in the corner of the square, placed there by a combination of narrative convenience, and the plumber's guild.
[22:09] <Furious> I walk over to the manhole cover and attempt to remove it
[22:09] <@Spiritcurse> The cover comes off easily, revealing a dark hole with a ladder.
[22:10] <GC> i casually walk over and drop down the hole
[22:10] <Dorian> Focusing my sorcerous wisardry, I cast a light spell on a rock and drop it down the hole.
[22:10] <GC> it hits me on the head
[22:10] <Dark> Waddling over, the bear stops at the top of the hole, looking downward
[22:11] <@Spiritcurse> The rock clatters off his head, landing with a splash in the water. It's not that deep.
[22:11] <@Spiritcurse> Of slightly more interest than the water level, is the pile of gnawed bones at the bottom of the ladder. I don't know why I didn't narrate that first, really.
[22:11] <Furious> I pick up the manhole cover and spin around with it at arms length, eventually throwing it in a random direction
[22:12] <Dorian> I climb down the ladder, making sure to not stand in the water.
[22:13] <Dark> The bear hops down the hole to land at the side of the water, keeping its artifical fur dry
[22:13] <GC> i ignore the bones and begin to inspect my surroundings
[22:13] <@Spiritcurse> The tunnels leads for a while in each direction, bones scattered here and there, and water drips from pipes mounted on the ceiling.
[22:13] <Dorian> I pick up the glowing rock, and use it as a makeshift torch.
[22:14] <GC> "all clear!" i shout up the manhole
[22:14] <Furious> I climb down the ladder after the others and look up the pipes on the celing
[22:15] <Codex> "It'll be fine. None of us will be bit and it will be completely fine." I proceed to climb down the ladder.
[22:15] <@Spiritcurse> The pipes are copper. All plumber-ship is of the highest quality.
[22:16] <Dark> The bear walks to the side, an orb of light of its own appearing beside it
[22:17] <Furious> I rub my finger on the copper pipe, getting some water on my finger. I proceed to lick the water
[22:17] <GC> "you know whats in that water right?"
[22:18] <@Spiritcurse> "Mmm, delicious metallic sewer water" would accurately describe an average reaction.
[22:19] <Furious> I walk down a tunnel to the north, exploring as far as the light from the rock allows
[22:19] <@Spiritcurse> You see a few twists and turns, most too small for a humanoid to follow. However, you do see a rather more fresh corpse, bobbing in the water slightly.
[22:20] <GC> i closley inspect the corpses
[22:20] <GC> "messy work. no artwork to it at all, it should be ashamed"
[22:21] <Furious> I rub my finger on the corpse, getting some liquid on my finger. I proceed to lick my finger
[22:21] <Dorian> I pass the rock to the man inspecting the corpses, "Take that, I need both hands free to cast properly."
[22:21] <@Spiritcurse> The body is clearly drained of most blood, and appears to be of a student. It tastes of eau-de-decaying-body.
[22:22] <Dark> Carrying its glowing stone, the bead kicks at the body gently
[22:22] <@Spiritcurse> The body bobs slightly in the water.
[22:22] <Furious> I enter the Hunter's Sense stance
[22:23] <@Spiritcurse> You smell a trail - something covered in a lot of blood passed this way recently. They went further down this corridor, then turned left.
[22:24] <GC> realising the one bearing the light goes first i quickly pass it to the warblade
[22:25] <Furious> I hold the light and draw a fullblade before following the scent
[22:25] <Codex> I cast light, draw my crossbow and get behind the rest of the mages.
[22:26] <Dark> The bear stays near the front, stone in hand whilst its unblinking eyes keep watch
[22:27] <Furious> 1d20-4
[22:29] <@Spiritcurse> Following the scent, you reach the corner. The smell is very strong now - the source must be very close.
[22:30] <GC> i begin to prepare a spell
[22:30] <Dark> Dropping its glowing stone, the bear taps its foot in a warning and raises its paws
[22:31] <Furious> I drop the glowing rock and draw my second fullblade
[22:31] <Codex> Casting Magic Weapon: Greater on my crossbow, I move to the side and ready myself.
[22:32] <GC> i kick the glowing rock round the corner
[22:33] <Dark> The bear sways a tad and a faint obscuring fog begins to surround it
[22:33] <@Spiritcurse> You hear a chorus of hissing, and three feral beings leap around at you! They're hunched over, dressed in tattered rags and robes, carrying small swords.
[22:35] <Dorian> I cast a ray of glowing red light in the face of whichever of these beings comes round the corner first.
[22:39] <@Spiritcurse> The first being raises his head and snarls, his eyes glowing red. He locks eyes with the fullblade-wielding warrior, and glares.
[22:41] <Furious> I turn around and swing my fullblades at the nearest ally
[22:46] <Furious> I hack and slash and Saral's arms, leaving cuts all over
[22:47] <@Spiritcurse> Another monster, this one dressed in the bloody remains of robes, pounces towards the crossbowman, madness and anger in it's eyes.
[22:48] <Furious> I scream my name "Luo Koi-Huo" randomly
[22:48] <@Spiritcurse> While Saral's swing misses, so does the monster's attempt to grab you.
[22:52] <Dorian> I turn to the being concentrating and, after some time concentrating, throw a bolt of pure darkness at it.
[22:59] <GC> i begin weaving my magic into the form of a ogre zomby
[22:59] <@Spiritcurse> You summon, despite your malformed rune, a large ogre zombie. It growls menacingly.
[23:02] <Codex> In response to being lept at by a feral and barely clothed thing, I move from it's grasp and pop it in the head with my crossbow.
[23:02] <@Spiritcurse> The somewhat charred being rises to it's feet, burnt flesh hanging off it. It lunges for the source of the burny hot pain.
[23:03] <@Spiritcurse> However, due to being on fire, it fails to actually aim.
[23:03] <Dark> Holding out its tiny arms, the bear begins to summon a swarm of rats from the depths of the sewers to swamp the nearest creature.
[23:06] <@Spiritcurse> The biting distracts the vampire, who's control is broken. It staggers backwards, hissing.
[23:06] <@Spiritcurse> And by vampire, I mean feral bloodthirsty beast.
[23:07] <Furious> I shake my head and in realization of my attack on Saral, I shout shout "WHAT HAVE IT DONE"
[23:08] <@Spiritcurse> Far above, in the tower of the chronogrammaticians, a scholar suffers an aneurysm. Clerics arrive by teleport almost immediately, and take the crippled student to the medicae centre.
[23:09] <@Spiritcurse> The beast, shaking off the rats, lunges for it's escaped victim.
[23:10] <@Spiritcurse> However, it slips on the blood on the floor, and crashes down to the ground.
[23:10] <Dark> The bear tilts its head at the falling creature, amused
[23:11] <Codex> "You got a weapon, little man?"
[23:13] <Dark> It looks to you and gestures to the rats and then its hands
[23:13] <Codex> "I suppose it might be hard to hold a knife, yeah."
[23:14] <Furious> I suddenly leap at the creature that just fell over and swing both my fullblades before returning back to the group
[23:14] <Dark> the bear seems to give an amused look
[23:16] <@Spiritcurse> The vampire beside the artificer makes another swipe for his head, baring his fangs and hissing the hiss of his people.
[23:17] <@Spiritcurse> Once again, he misses. He's not a very good evil monster.
[23:19] <Dorian> I summon up another bolt of pure hate and throw it at the vampire that's still face first on the floor.
[23:21] <@Spiritcurse> He crumbles to dust, leaving only a smear of blood as proof of his existence.
[23:24] <GC> my ogre raises one of its gigantic hands and brings it down on the burning vampire. crushing it into a pool of blood and rotting organs
[23:25] <GC> i spin around and fling a spell at the remaining vampire
[23:26] <@Spiritcurse> The attack misses, much to the amusement of the beast.
[23:26] <Codex> Taking a step backwards, I cast Heat Metal on the end of the bolt embeded in the remaining vampire's face.
[23:27] <@Spiritcurse> The beast hisses in agony, and writhes about.
[23:27] <Dark> holding its stubs close, the bear shoots a ball of fire
[23:29] <@Spiritcurse> The flames engulf the beast, and it too crumbles to a fine powder.
[23:30] <Codex> I loot the fine powder.
[23:30] <Dark> Nodding to itself at the beasts death, the bear leans forwards to pat one of its summoned rats on the bead before allowing them to scatter
[23:30] <Dorian> I start gathering the vampire dust, secreting it away in a pocket in my volumous coat.
[23:30] <Furious> I turn to Saral and apologise for nearly maiming him. "Errr, sorry?"
[23:31] <Dorian> "It's alright, no harm done."
[23:31] <Dorian> I then proceed to cure up all of my wounds.
[23:31] <GC> i dismiss my minion
[23:32] <Dark> Waddling forwards, the bear kicks at some of the ash before immidiatly seeming to regret doing so as it swats to remove the resulting ash stuck to its fur
[23:32] <@Spiritcurse> The giant fades away, and the symbol of Dollurh glares in the air for a moment before it too, fades.
[23:32] <Furious> I sheathe both my swords and pick up the glowing the rock, before walking towards the exit of the sewer
[23:32] <Codex> "Don't worry little man, I'm sure it'll clean off. Makes invisibility potions you know!"
[23:33] <Codex> "Mix it with bug eggs and you'll never see it again."
[23:33] <Dark> The bear looks back to you before nodding and putting a small amount into a bottle on its waist
[23:33] <@Spiritcurse> You return to the entrance, covered in blood, sewer water, and the ashes of vampires. It's just like that time at bible camp.
[23:34] <Furious> I reminisce about that time at bible camp
[23:34] <Dark> the bear remembers it well
[23:35] <GC> father broadbeard was a nice chap. very pointy lap however
[23:35] <Furious> "That's the last thing I thought you could use a crucifix for"
[23:36] <Codex> "Anyone see the twat who sent us down there?"
[23:36] <Dorian> "You know, I'm afraind I don't even, and never shall."
[23:36] <Dorian> "Also, fuck chronogrammaticians."
[23:37] <@Spiritcurse> Barely recovered from the last operation, the chronogrammatician suffers another stroke. A detachment of clerics is summoned, but quickly consign his soul to Dollurh.
[23:37] <GC> i begin to make my way out of the sewer
[23:38] <@Spiritcurse> At the top, you again see the wizard telling a group of students to do inane, apparently life-threatening tasks. He laugh frequently.
[23:38] <Dark> The bear pauses as it stares at the ladder, clearly to small to actually use it effectivly before clapping its paws and walking up the wall like a spider
[23:38] <@Spiritcurse> The mouth sounds a loud bell chime, before speaking. "The warlock's guild would like to make it known that they do not 'do it without resting', regardless of the rumours."
[23:39] <Dorian> "Hah! It's funny because they actually do."
[23:39] <GC> "Indeed"
[23:39] <@Spiritcurse> You notice an elderly tiefling glare at you for a moment, before vanishing in a puff of smoke.
[23:40] <Furious> I double-take at the puff of smoke, before rubbing my eyes "What that was?"
[23:40] <GC> I wisper to Saral "I do believe we upset her".
[23:40] <Dorian> "Bloody Tieflings, always thinking they're better than us just because they're half and half."
[23:42] <Codex> I approach the twat who sent us down the man hole. "Done."
[23:42] <@Spiritcurse> "Haha, holy shit, you actually did it!". The wizard seems both amazed and surprised.
[23:42] <Codex> "And only one of us got bit!"
[23:42] <Dark> The bear looks at him and taps its foot impatiantly
[23:42] <GC> I walk up and consider hitting the olf fart but thing better of it.
[23:43] <Dorian> "Yes, that was you."
[23:43] <@Spiritcurse> "I honestly didn't think you'd do it."
[23:43] <Furious> "My blades got er... a lot of use"
[23:43] <Codex> "Wh-Why are you sending new students down there?"
[23:44] <GC> "I rather enjoyed it"
[23:44] <@Spiritcurse> "Wouldn't you, if you were me?"
[23:44] <GC> "Yes".
[23:44] <Codex> I pause for a moment.
[23:44] <Dark> Despite having only a stuffed face, the bear somehow manages to give a "Wha?" look
[23:44] <Codex> "Fair enough."
[23:44] <Furious> I sigh before saying "What do you want us to do now you crusty old bastard"
[23:44] <Dorian> "Eh, probably. Only I'd have them doing more useful stuff."
[23:45] <@Spiritcurse> "I don't know. Would you like me to tell you a secret?"
[23:45] <GC> "Like killing first years?"
[23:45] <Dorian> "Go for it."
[23:45] <@Spiritcurse> He leans in close, and gestures for you to do the same.
[23:45] <Dorian> I lean in as well.
[23:45] <Furious> I make a point of not leaning in
[23:46] <Codex> I lean in, regretting my decision.
[23:46] <@Spiritcurse> He whispers "I don't even work here", before vanishing in a puff of rainbow coloured smoke.
[23:46] <Dark> The bear stands on its stubs the same as one would stand on tip toes
[23:46] <Codex> "Y- You bastard."
[23:46] <Dorian> "That...
[23:46] <Dorian> That was perfect."
[23:46] <GC> I make a note of hitting the bastard at the soonest possible opportunity.
[23:47] <Dark> You would need to get in line behind the bear
[23:47] <GC> "Well...mobving on".
[23:48] <Codex> I sigh and approach the main building, looking for a front door or something.
[23:48] <Dorian> "Shall we get properly signed in, then?"
[23:49] <@Spiritcurse> The door to the main hall is large and reinforced. Dwarven work.
[23:49] <GC> I pass Penny and enter the hall.
[23:50] <@Spiritcurse> Inside, you see a veritable jungle, with vines and twisting trees adorning the walls. A small waterfall and pond is on the far side, with an elf giving a lecture from atop a tree stump to a group of students.
[23:50] <Furious> Following Hohenheim I grumble about how I knew there was something up with that wizard
[23:51] <Dorian> I sigh, and follow the group, casually whistling to myself.
[23:53] <Dark> The bear plods along mute as ever
[23:53] <@Spiritcurse> A dwarf approaches you from a side corridor, this one more like what you'd expect from an interior. He looks you up and... well, further up.
[23:53] <@Spiritcurse> "You the newbies then?"
[23:54] <Codex> "Yes. Are you aware of the twat outside sending students to their death?"
[23:54] <@Spiritcurse> "No, what's he done?"
[23:55] <Codex> "There's several corpses in the sewer."
[23:55] <GC> "He sent us to our death".
[23:55] <Furious> "Yeah... not entirely sure who they were either"
[23:55] <Dorian> "Then he buggerred off with wizard powers."
[23:55] <Codex> "I'd like to say I'm mad, but he was actually pretty hilarious."
[23:55] <Dark> The bear simply folds its arms
[23:55] <@Spiritcurse> "I did wonder why we had so few first years. Anyway, are you hear to learn MAGIC?" At this word, his beard glows with the very glow of Irian itself, and he chuckles.
[23:56] <Codex> I nod, grinning.
[23:56] <GC> "Nah, just looking for the john".
[23:56] <@Spiritcurse> "Chronogrammatician Erica! I'm sorry!" he yells to a fainting woman on the other side of the hall. "I really don't understand the point of them."
[23:57] <@Spiritcurse> "Right. So, MAGIC!" Again, the glowing. It's really quite intense. "How much do you all know?"
[23:57] <Furious> I roll my eyes and tap my foot on the ground, signalling bordem
[23:58] <Codex> "I uh,"
[23:58] <Furious> "I can safely say I know some magic"
[23:58] <Codex> "Some, I guess?"
[23:58] <Dark> The bear seems on the verge of wondering off
[23:58] <GC> "Yes".
[23:58] <@Spiritcurse> "WONDERFUL! In that case, you're better than a good half of our students! Welcome aboard!"
[23:59] <Dorian> "This sounds promising."
[23:59] <Codex> "Should we be afraid?"
[23:59] <GC> "I knew we should have started killing the first years".
[23:59] <@Spiritcurse> "Oh yes, be afraid. Be very afraid!" His beard appears to be glowing at random intervals now, and in different colours.
[00:00] <Dark> The bear taps its hands, wondering if the flames would change colour were it to set him on fire
[00:00] <Furious> "A challenge I welcome! My blades, hungry they are."
[00:01] <GC> I thrust my hand into the mans beard to see if it is warm.
[00:01] <@Spiritcurse> "Anyway! Here at Morgrave University, we take a novel approach to magic! We throw arcane power at the wall, and see what sticks! Sometimes literally. Come with- what are you doing."
[00:01] <Dorian> "Magic, I think."
[00:01] <GC> "Seeing if your beard was warm..."
[00:01] <Codex> "The powerful kind."
[00:02] <@Spiritcurse> "AHAHA! MAGIC! Come, brother, let us wizard!" He hums, and his beard grows warmer.
[00:02] <GC> "Oh wait that's not normal". i withdraw my hand. "Sorry about that".
[00:02] <@Spiritcurse> "Quite alright! Now, to the laboratories!"
[00:02] <@Spiritcurse> He vanishes in a puff of glitter and possibly homosexuality, as befits most magi met so far.
[00:03] <Dorian> "Goddamn, we're going to have to learn that, aren't we?"
[00:03] <GC> I wisper to Luo Koi-Huo "his beard was as soft as silk".
[00:03] <@Spiritcurse> He reappears after a few moments. "Oh yeah, you guys still walk, don't you? Come!" he bellows, and begins walking down a corridor.
[00:03] <Furious> "An excellent exit, it musted be learn by me!"
[00:04] <Furious> I follow the Dwarf down the corridor
[00:04] <GC> "I really need to teach you English".
[00:04] <Dorian> I shrug, and follow Luo.
[00:05] <@Spiritcurse> The dwarf points out various places of interest in the corridor. "Here is the portal to Fernia, sea of fire. We use it for heating in the winter."
[00:05] <Dark> The bear follows in silence, seemingly deep in contemplation about the beard burning idea
[00:05] <@Spiritcurse> "This is a giant pile of zombie bits. It's a big hit with the ghoul students."
[00:06] <@Spiritcurse> "And here is a room full of rainbows. I don't actually know why we bought this. It cost us millions of platinum, and it doesn't DO anything. Kind of like the Archchancellor."
[00:07] <Codex> "Hah."
[00:07] <Dorian> "Because rainbows?"
[00:07] <GC> "Facinating. Where do you store your corpses?"
[00:07] <@Spiritcurse> "Anyway, I'll let you get on with your days. Go do some magic, and I want a planar conflux by the end of the month from each of you."
[00:08] <@Spiritcurse> "I think we throw them in the trash, why?"
[00:08] <GC> "No reason".
[00:08] <Codex> "So uh, How do we get a planar conflux, each, by the end of the month?"
[00:08] <Dorian> "Isn;t a Planar Conflux ridiculously high level magic?"
[00:08] <Furious> "What exactly is a conflux planar and do how get one I?"
[00:09] <GC> "A whatsit who where?"
[00:09] <@Spiritcurse> "Ah, questions! Wonderful! Basically, you work up to them. There's a monastery a few leagues north of here, which should have some in the catacombs. Be warned - the inhabitants can kill people with the bare hands."
[00:10] <@Spiritcurse> "I'm sorry, Erica!"
[00:10] <Dorian> "Which they stole with their bear hands?"
[00:10] <Codex> I suppress a giggle.
[00:10] <Dark> the bear holds its paws up in a vain attempt to make a put pun
[00:10] <Furious> "How would we obtain these hand bears?"
[00:10] <@Spiritcurse> "I'm not sure. Let me think." He strokes his beard, which emits a clicking noise. "He says probably."
[00:11] <Furious> "Did something break? I heard a click"
[00:11] <@Spiritcurse> "No, that's normal."
[00:11] <Furious> "Excellent"
[00:14] <Dorian> "So, what next?"
[00:14] <Furious> "Where be we will staying nightover?"
[00:15] <@Spiritcurse> "You're more than welcome to stay here. Find a bed that isn't currently occupied or on fire."
[00:15] <Dark> The bear tilts its head again before shrugging
[00:17] <Codex> "Sounds good, thank you very much."
[00:17] <Codex> "Is there any first step kind of thing you can reccomend?"
[00:17] <Furious> "It's more than they gave us at bible camp" I shudder
[00:17] <@Spiritcurse> "Find a method of transport!" He replies, vanishing with a small fanfare, a brief shower of confetti, and a giggle.
[00:18] <GC> "All we got there was a healing salve and a comfort blanket".
[00:19] <Dark> The bear shudders slightly
[00:19] <Furious> "I'm sure my salve had some kind of drug in it, it's the only way to explain how I woke up naked with a week missing from memory"
[00:19] <Furious> "Anyway, let's off be"
[00:20] <GC> I snap back to reality "yes lets get moving".
[00:20] <Dorian> "Alright, time to find the dormatories."
[00:21] <Codex> I follow Sarol's keen nose.
[00:22] <Dark> The bear follows for the sake of going somewhere
[00:22] <Furious> I sniff the air, attempting to pick up the scent of an empty bed that isn't on fire
[00:23] <@Spiritcurse> Your sense-sense refuses to tingle.
[00:23] <Furious> "Ok guys I've checked there's no way there are any empty beds that aren't on fire"
[00:24] <Dark> The bear doset seem surprised
[00:24] <@Spiritcurse> You manage to search out a large map of the university. "Bedrooms" are indicated, roughly 3 floors above where you are.
[00:24] <GC> "Well. who knows any water spells?"
[00:24] <Dark> The bear holds up a paw
[00:25] <Dorian> "Yo."
[00:25] <Furious> "I could cast Obscuring Mist, although I doubt a cloud of fog would be what you're looking for"
[00:25] <GC> "GREAT. We wont burn to death then."
[00:27] <Dorian> I proceed to follow the map to the bedrooms, and look for a specific bed that isn't completely awful.
[00:27] <Furious> I grab the map, and attempt to navigate around the university
[00:27] <Furious> When he grabs it back, I follow him
[00:28] <GC> I follow Saral.
[00:28] <Dark> The bear as ever follows in silence
[00:28] <@Spiritcurse> Heading upstairs, you note that several rooms are actually on fire. You also notice a halfling in a swimsuit, asking a student if she looks cute. Finally, you find an empty room that isn't on fire.
[00:30] <Furious> I enter the empty room and survey it, checking the number of beds and their locations within the room
[00:30] <@Spiritcurse> There are a good dozen beds, equally spaced around the room. None of them are actively on fire.
[00:30] <GC> I hurry in and grab the first bed that appears safe after inspection.
[00:31] <GC> I dont actually sit on it though
[00:31] <Furious> I cast Firey Eyes on the bed
[00:31] <@Spiritcurse> This is a pine bed. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality. It menaces with spikes of pillows.
[00:32] <Dark> The bear slumps before looking around at any other furniture in the room
[00:32] <@Spiritcurse> As a result of your spell, one of the beds is now on fire.
[00:32] <Codex> "Need a hand, little man?"
[00:33] <Dorian> I sigh, and attempt to find a bed in a seculded corner, or preferably a bed in a private room.
[00:33] <Dark> The bear makes an sign to indicate it wants a shelf
[00:33] <Furious> I cast ray of frost on the same bed as before
[00:33] <@Spiritcurse> You find a bed in the corner. It's the same as the other beds really. There are some shelves above each bed, through the power of narrative convenience.
[00:34] <@Spiritcurse> The beds-on-fire count decreases by one.
[00:34] <Dark> The bear hops under down underneaith one
[00:34] <Codex> Somehow getting the message, I place my hand out to offer a lift to the shelf above my own bed.
[00:35] <GC> I go to the other corner and check the bed before deeming it safe and claiming it.
[00:35] <Dorian> I quickly claim the bed in the corner, by promptly falling face first onto it.
[00:35] <Furious> Content with my extinguishing abilities, I find an empty bed and sit down before removing my shoes and lying on the bed
[00:35] <@Spiritcurse> The beds are comfy and soft. And not on fire, which puts them easily in the top 10% of beds.
[00:36] <Codex> "We're lucky. These are good beds."
[00:36] <Furious> "There must be something wrong with these beds, otherwise why wouldn't they be taken already"
[00:36] <Furious> "I don't trust the beds"
[00:36] <Dark> The bear happily settles down on the shelf
[00:36] <Furious> "Damn beds"
[00:36] <Dorian> "Sheer luck and that mad git out front?"
[00:36] <GC> "Why do you think i'm not sat on mine"
[00:36] <Furious> I immediately put my shoes back on and slash the bed furiously
[00:36] <Codex> "They must have been owned by the students that passed out to let us replace them."
[00:37] <GC> "Incidentally, I'd watch my everything if i were you Saral"
[00:37] <Furious> I stop slashing "Good point" I return as I was before, to my serverely slashed up bed
[00:37] <@Spiritcurse> Under your powerful onslaught, the bed offers no resistence. It shatters into a thousand fragments of wood.
[00:37] <Codex> I park my arse on a bed and drop my bag by it.
[00:37] <Furious> I am lying on the floor
[00:37] <Dorian> "Sir, I can set fire to things with my mind. I do what I want."
[00:39] <Furious> After noticing no one is going to repair my bed, I find a non-destroyed/on fire/occupied bed
[00:39] <Dark> The bear seems to have fallen asleep on its shelf
[00:41] <GC> I cautiously rest on my bed.

_________________


"Problems? Problems!? There is no problem I can't solve with this!"
- Mad Chainsaw Johnson

"Violence. If it's not solving all of your problems, then you simply aren't using enough of it."
- Unknown

(A)bort, (R)etry, (B)lame a Tinker Gnome?

"Dude, I've got a list of people who are going to survive. It's not into double digits."
- Me, of all people
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DorianCreed
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Re: WIZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!11!!!!!!!!!!!!!!one!!!11!oneone!!1eleven

Post by Twilightwings on Tue Mar 05, 2013 6:48 pm

Why was I not invited to this? this looks fun... I'm no longer loved... T_T
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Twilightwings
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Re: WIZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!11!!!!!!!!!!!!!!one!!!11!oneone!!1eleven

Post by Spiritcurse on Sat Mar 16, 2013 11:52 pm

[21:17] <Spiritcurse> Right, last time we spoke, you were trying to find beds that weren't on fire. In a broad sense, this succeeded. There was some shite about going to a monastery, and your wizard projects are due in a couple of weeks. You are woken up, as per usual, by a large explosion from a few floors below. Nothing is apparently done about this.
[21:17] <Spiritcurse> Oh, and there's another wizard in your room. Just pretend he's been there all along.
[21:18] <Dorian> "Goddamn, I need some coffee."
[21:20] <Codex> I offer the teddy a lift down from the shelf. "Come on, we need our mcguffin before the month is up."
[21:20] <@Tavolk> "Oh... You're new"
[21:20] <Codex> "Where the glittering fuck did you come from?"
[21:21] <Dorian> "Probably a glittering fuck, from the look of him."
[21:21] <@Tavolk> "I think I er.... Fell throught the plot holes"
[21:22] <GC> "I find it hard to attempt an understanding of this situation".
[21:22] <@Tavolk> I scratch my head
[21:22] <Spiritcurse> He's been here all along. Just roll with it.
[21:22] <Furious> I cast firey eyes and look at the bed
[21:23] <Spiritcurse> The bed once more bursts into flames. It's not paid enough for this shit.
[21:23] <Dorian> "Stop burning the bed, it didn't do anything to you."
[21:23] <@Tavolk> I look at the man with the swords who was being mean to the bed "You're a meanie"
[21:24] <GC> "I swear to the gods if you burn one more bed i will throw you out the gods damn window!!"
[21:24] <Furious> I cast bull's strength
[21:24] <Dorian> "Which one? I'm pretty sure I saw one that looked out on Xoriat."
[21:24] <Codex> I quickly exit the room.
[21:26] <Spiritcurse> Outside the room is, thankfully, the same corridor that was there last night. That bodes well. The stairs are a short way away, going up and down, and there are 5 more rooms on this floor.
[21:26] <Codex> I dart back in and grab the sleeping teddy, placeing him in a shirt pocket before exiting again.
[21:27] <@Tavolk> "HEY MISTER" I sprint after Penny "Where you goin ?"
[21:27] <Codex> "Oh god, you're happy as well as glittering."
[21:27] <@Tavolk> As i leave the room I look surprised "This isn't the corridor that was here last night"
[21:27] <@Tavolk> "Oh yeah. Sometimes."
[21:27] <@Tavolk> I grin
[21:28] <Dorian> Still back in the room, I gesture to the two other occupants. "Come on, you two, we've got wizardry to do."
[21:28] <Dorian> I then exit the room
[21:28] <Furious> I follow
[21:28] <GC> I closley follow.
[21:28] <Codex> We need a mcguffin to complete our assignment before the end of the month. It's pretty high level magic, so we need to get to the monistary to acquire more knowledge and mcguffins.
[21:29] <Codex> "So, does anyone know the way?"
[21:30] <Furious> I enter the Hunter's Sense stance and attempt to smell my way to the monastery
[21:31] <Spiritcurse> You smell a traveller, some days ago, travelling to a monastery. The scent leads out of the window, and towards the river.
[21:31] <Furious> I jump out of the window
[21:31] <@Tavolk> "MISTER!"
[21:32] <@Tavolk> I run to the window
[21:32] <GC> "He he he".
[21:32] <Spiritcurse> Several metres later, you realise that you're quite a few floors up. In Sharn. Where buildings are made on floating bits of rock, high off the ground.
[21:34] <Codex> "Does anybody know something to help him?"
[21:34] <@Tavolk> I jump out the window clicking my fingers *casting featherfall and the whole party* "WEEEEEEEE good idea mister" I glide down the side of the tower.
[21:34] <GC> "Yes but i'm not doing it".
[21:34] <GC> I pirouette out the window
[21:35] <Spiritcurse> You glide down, observing the many sights of Sharn. Anybody wearing robes should probably regret this decision, as it's fairly chilly. To say nothing of the damned river below you.
[21:35] <Codex> "I never asked for this." I say, securing the pocket within which the teddy is and leap through the window after them.
[21:35] <@Tavolk> "You guys... where are we gonna land..."
[21:36] <Spiritcurse> Far below, you see an array of choice landing spots. There's a river, another bit of river, more river, even more river, and amazingly enough, a small island!
[21:36] <Spiritcurse> I'm joking. It's more river.
[21:36] <Furious> I fold my arms and tap my foot on the air
[21:37] <@Tavolk> "Damned narrator" *sticks his tounge out at nothing you can see*
[21:37] <Spiritcurse> Of course, it's a busy river. If you float towards a boat, you could always... drop in.
[21:37] <GC> "Why didn't we look before jumping".
[21:38] <@Tavolk> "Gee I unno mister... Seemed fun"
[21:38] <Dorian> As we reach the bottom, I cast Pass Without Trace, because fuck terrain.
[21:38] <GC> "That would work" i say to noone in particular before heading to the nearest boat.
[21:40] <Spiritcurse> You land, quite neatly, on a small yacht! Except the large indian man, who sinks seamlessly through the water. It doesn't even splash.
[21:40] <Codex> "We landed quite luckily. I assume your nose is telling you where to go?"
[21:40] <Dorian> I then proceed to walk out of the river
[21:40] <@Tavolk> "Can we go again?"
[21:41] <Spiritcurse> The captain of the boat, pausing only to pick up his jaw, walks up to you. "Damn wizards."
[21:42] <Codex> "Hello there sir, Sorry to... drop in, like this."
[21:42] <Furious> I smell the air for a scent of monastery
[21:42] <Spiritcurse> "Eh, happens all the time."
[21:42] <@Tavolk> "Nice boat"
[21:42] <Spiritcurse> The air to the north smells of monastic traditions.
[21:43] <Furious> I point north
[21:43] <GC> I turn to the swordsman, "Do NOT BURN IT!!!"
[21:43] <Spiritcurse> "You... you want to go north?"
[21:43] <Furious> My eyes glow for a moment, then return to normal
[21:43] <@Tavolk> I whisper to the captain "He burns things"
[21:43] <Codex> "W-was that a yes?"
[21:43] <Dorian> I jump to the boat because wizard, apparently. "What up?"
[21:44] <GC> I hit the swordsdman with a fish to calm his nerves.
[21:44] <Spiritcurse> "Just negotation travel with a group of insane wizards. You?"
[21:45] <Dorian> "Being part of a group of insane wizard who happen to be negotiating travel, but other than that, nothing much."
[21:45] <Spiritcurse> "I see. Well, where would you like to go? Clearly, my plans for the day mean little."
[21:45] <GC> "After we leave check your boat for fires".
[21:46] <Dorian> "North. To some shitty ass monestary."
[21:46] <@Tavolk> "It might not be shitty" *looks hopeful*
[21:46] <Furious> "It'll be just like Bible Camp"
[21:46] <Codex> "I'm sure we'll learn alot about transdimensional whatcha-majigers from the monks."
[21:47] <Dorian> "It will be, trust me. All monasteries are. No bitches, all witches."
[21:47] <Codex> "Do we know what kind of monks they are?"
[21:47] <GC> "If they are sending us there it either IS shitty or it soon will be".
[21:47] <Dorian> "Also liches."
[21:47] <Spiritcurse> "The... the monastary? Are you sure? The occupants there train for years! They can kill people with their bare hands!"
[21:47] <Dorian> "Well, I can kill people with my bear hands. Which I stole with my bare hands."
[21:47] <Spiritcurse> "Fine. It'll be about two hours. Do you intend to pay, at all?"
[21:47] <GC> "No".
[21:48] <Dorian> i wave my hand in his face, "You will not take money off us."
[21:49] <Spiritcurse> The man frowns slightly. "Look, even just covering my costs would be grand."
[21:49] <GC> "No".
[21:49] <Dorian> "No, they won't."
[21:49] <GC> I begin hitting the man with the fish.
[21:49] <@Tavolk> "I would but don't have any money..."
[21:49] <Spiritcurse> He sighs. "Will you at least stop that?"
[21:50] <Dorian> I take the fish and eat it.
[21:50] <GC> "No".
[21:50] <@Tavolk> "does that count as payment?"
[21:50] <Spiritcurse> "If you can keep these people under control, then fine."
[21:50] <GC> "Not making any promises".
[21:50] <Codex> "Don't worry sir, we'll keep fires to an absolute mininum."
[21:51] <GC> "Now who wants some roast fish?"
[21:51] <Furious> I sit down and prepare for a long journey of sniffing the air
[21:51] <Spiritcurse> "Grand." He turns away and begins steering the ship. Amuse yourself in whatever foul depraved way you do for two hours.
[21:51] <@Tavolk> *edges away from the air sniffer*
[21:52] <Dorian> I gesture at the swordsman, "He will navigate. I'm going to sleep." I then fall asleep face first on the deck, not even bothering to sit down.
[21:52] <@Tavolk> "Erm.. mister" *I poke him*
[21:52] <@Tavolk> "You okay?"
[21:52] <Codex> "Shush child. Only sleep now."
[21:52] <Dorian> "DON'T INTERRUPT ME WHEN I'M SLEEPING OR I'LL EAT YOUR FUCKING FACE!!!"
[21:53] <GC> "I's listen to him if I were you".
[21:53] <@Tavolk> "AHHHHHHHH" I run to Penny and cling to his leg
[21:54] <Codex> "How did you even get into the university, errr..?"
[21:54] <GC> "Me?"
[21:54] <Codex> "The kid I mean,"
[21:55] <@Tavolk> "Oh..." *looks up at Penny* "I told you.. a plothole. Mummy was a seeker of the fourth wall and daddy was a wayfarer guide... things were bound to go wrong..."
[21:56] <Codex> "I... I see."
[21:56] <Dorian> "Dat plothole..." I murmur in my sleep, obviously enjoying whatever dream I'm having.
[21:56] <Codex> "So, what's your name, plothole?"
[21:58] <@Tavolk> *shudders* "My names Dave... Dave the Illumian" *grins widely*
[21:58] <GC> "I don't like it, CHANGE IT AT ONCE!"
[21:59] <@Tavolk> "And who are all you..."
[21:59] <@Tavolk> "Hey..."
[21:59] <Codex> "I think we should call you Plothole."
[21:59] <GC> "Much better".
[21:59] <@Tavolk> "I... I like it... Dave was such a wierd name anyway"
[22:00] <Furious> I am too busy sniffing the air to notice the conversation
[22:00] <Spiritcurse> The monkey smell in the air intensifies. That is, the smell of monks. Not primates. Monks.
[22:01] <Furious> "Wait, I think I smell monkey- never mind, it's just monks."
[22:01] <Spiritcurse> The captain shouts at you. "Oi, wizards. Your monastery's here. Good luck." He points into the trees on the east bank.
[22:03] <Furious> I smell the air to make sure there are no monkeys, before climbing out onto the bank.
[22:03] <Dorian> I turn to Luo, "So? Right monestary?"
[22:03] <Codex> "Thank you sir, very kind of you!"
[22:03] <GC> I do yet another mother fucking pirouette off the side of the boat closest to the direction the boatman was pointing in.
[22:04] <Spiritcurse> The captain raises an eyebrow at your unusual style of pirouetting.
[22:04] <GC> "Oh come now, you know you like these moves" i shout back.
[22:04] <Spiritcurse> Anyway. There's a jungle. A fuckoff canopy of green leaves, long grass, and deadly vipers. Probably.
[22:05] <Furious> I sniff the air
[22:05] <GC> "Are they edible?!"
[22:05] <Dorian> "Oh, shit, too dark. I fucking hate Grues."
[22:05] <Spiritcurse> Somewhere in a vaugely easterly direction lies a monastery, the occupants of which can kill a man with their bare hands.
[22:06] <Furious> I point east and walk towards the scent
[22:06] <GC> I follow the mentally unstable swordsman.
[22:06] <Spiritcurse> You stride into the grass. So far, so devoid-of-deadly-vipers. A winner is you.
[22:06] <Codex> As do I.
[22:06] <@Tavolk> I walk next to Penny trying to hold his hand
[22:06] <Dorian> I follow Luo as well, on my guard.
[22:08] <Spiritcurse> You see nothing out of the ordinary. Clearly, nothing is wrong.
[22:10] <Dorian> Due to nothing clearly being wrong, I listen for anything that might be wrong.
[22:10] <Spiritcurse> You think you hear the cry of an injured dolphin in the treetops!
[22:11] <Furious> I sniff the air for any scent of spider or poisonous snake
[22:11] <Dorian> "HANG ON, MY FRIEND! I SHALL SAVE YOU!" I cry, and proceed to climb the nearest tree.
[22:11] <Spiritcurse> If there are any, the scent is masked by jungle and monkey shit. That is, the excreta of monks.
[22:11] <Spiritcurse> You make it roughly zero feet up the tree.
[22:13] <Dorian> "A'ight, fuck this, I'm too sober to climb a tree."
[22:13] <Furious> I cast detect poison
[22:14] <Spiritcurse> The highest concentration of poison in the area is the massive amount of alcohol in the bloodstream of probably all of you.
[22:14] <Dorian> I sigh, and head for the monestary, still on my guard.
[22:14] <Furious> I slowly walk 5ft forwards
[22:15] <@Tavolk> "Wimps" Dave, sorry, plothole strides frwards
[22:15] <GC> i follow
[22:15] <Spiritcurse> You survive. Truly, you are a foe to be feared, to triumph over 5' more of grass.
[22:16] <Furious> I raise my fist "Yes! Yes!"
[22:16] <Codex> Let's push on.
[22:17] <Spiritcurse> You press forward. Every so often, you think you see a shadowy figure, or hear the cracking of branches, or smell monkey business. As in, the affairs of a religious group of martial artists.
[22:18] <Codex> "It'll be fine, lets continue. Any guesstimation on how far we are away?"
[22:19] <Dorian> "Approximately 1.21 giggamiles."
[22:19] <Furious> I sniff the air, attempting to tell how far away from the monk by the intensity of the smell of monkey shit
[22:19] <Spiritcurse> Judging by the smell of prayer and exercise, you think you're a couple hundred feet away.
[22:22] <Furious> I walk towards the monastery and knock on the door
[22:24] <Spiritcurse> You see a figure in the trees, watching you. It's a rather rotund being, holding a pair of daggers and wearing a wide brimmed straw hat. A loose robe covers him, or her, or possibly it, up.
[22:25] <Dorian> I cast Charm Person at it.
[22:26] <Spiritcurse> Seeing you cast a spell, it hurls it's daggers at you, unfazed by your magic.
[22:27] <Spiritcurse> It calls out to you, with a deep, booming voice. "Your enchantments hold no sway over me, mage! Who among you will challenge me in combat?" He leaps from the trees, landing softly among the grass a short distance away.
[22:27] <GC> "Swordsman, your up"
[22:28] <@Tavolk> "Him" *points to someone*
[22:28] <Dorian> I sigh, and cast a blot of darkness and fuck balance at him.
[22:28] <Dorian> Preempted by a casting of True Strike
[22:29] <Spiritcurse> Your bolt catches him in the chest, and he grunts in anger. He sprints towards you, trying to pin you to the ground.
[22:31] <Spiritcurse> The man drags you to the ground. His hands feel like claws as he wrestles with you.
[22:33] <Spiritcurse> The man pinning you to the ground crushes you in his arms.
[22:36] <@Tavolk> "eep" *clicks fingers * a golden aura appears around Saral
[22:36] <@Tavolk> *stays behind Peny*
[22:37] <GC> I hurl a bolt of hate and lasers at the asailing figure.
[22:37] <Spiritcurse> You hear a chime of a gong, and the doors to the monastery fly open. Three more robed figures bar your path.
[22:39] <Codex> I turn to the Chinese guy with the swords and throw my arms up at him, casting a spell of Bull's Strength.
[22:40] <Codex> I also draw my crossbow.
[22:40] <Dorian> I grab the monk I'm grappling with and begin to transfer my wounds to him.
[22:42] <Spiritcurse> Two of the monks pick up staves from by the door, and rush towards you. They're a small distance away, and should reach you soon.
[22:43] <Furious> I 'suddenly leap' towards the monk grappling with Saral and swing both my fullblades, before returning to the group
[22:47] <Spiritcurse> The monk collapses to the ground, his eyes lifeless. His hood slips, revealing a probably not surprising sight. It's a mother fucking panda.
[22:47] <Furious> "But... it smelled like monkey shit"
[22:47] <Dorian> "RIGHT, EVERYTHING DIES."
[22:47] <Codex> "Yes, MONKey."
[22:48] <Spiritcurse> Another monk bellows out "You die now. We kill you, with our bear hands."
[22:48] <GC> "Before we begin, are you edible?"
[22:49] <@Tavolk> "I know that voice..." Plothole thinks... "Are you kobolds?"
[22:52] <@Tavolk> * I click my fingers and a spray of acid egulfs a tree* "NO! Stupid magic. THE OTHER WAY!'
[22:53] <@Tavolk> My runed heads begin to glow
[22:54] <GC> I focus my magic into the form of a swarm of razor sharp knives that begin floating around my head. i then look at the closest monk as one of the knives hurtles towards it.
[22:55] <Spiritcurse> The knife stabs one monk in the chest. He roars angrily.
[22:55] <Spiritcurse> The bear that stayed in the building lets out a fearsome roar. Another bear answers "Of course, master. This interruption to our prayers will not go unpunished."
[22:56] <Codex> "We're just here for the McGuffin, no one else has to get hurt."
[22:57] <Spiritcurse> "No! Is object of our prayers! You will not take it!"
[22:57] <@Tavolk> "Is this McGuffin a candle?"
[22:58] <Spiritcurse> "How dare you insult us in such a manner!"
[22:58] <Spiritcurse> The other guard shouts "It is a focus of planar magic! With it, our master seeks to transcend mortality itself!"
[22:58] <@Tavolk> "why?"
[22:59] <Codex> "Thank you for the information sir," I say, firing my crossbow into the sky accidentally.
[22:59] <Spiritcurse> "He seeks to travel to another plane, where invaders like you cannot reach us!"
[22:59] <Spiritcurse> Several seconds later, a crossbow bolt lands vertically just in front of you. Lucky miss.
[23:00] <@Tavolk> "We're not invaders... We just need to see the McGuffin"
[23:02] <Spiritcurse> "You will not have it! We have almost completed our ritual!"
[23:02] <Dorian> I raise my hand and send a fuck-off crossbow bolt at one of them.
[23:02] <@Tavolk> "Huh.... GUYS THEY MIGHT NOT BE KOBOLDS' Plothole looks at them wearily
[23:03] <Spiritcurse> One guard bends to the side, slapping the bolt aside. It explodes into another bolt, and the other guard does the same.
[23:04] <Spiritcurse> The guards rush towards the sword wielder, and make several clawing motions.
[23:07] <Furious> I swing both my swords at the nearest monk
[23:10] <Furious> I withdraw my blades from the panda's chest, smirking as he slumps over to the side
[23:10] <Furious> the other one also dies
[23:10] <Spiritcurse> With his dying breath, the first panda stammers out "No... we must... the portal... we must reach..."
[23:11] <Spiritcurse> The second one completes his dying brother's sentence. "Windswept... depths... of Pandamonium."
[23:12] <Dorian> I sigh, and begin healing my wounds with sheer sorcery
[23:12] <Dorian> I also loot the panda corpses
[23:13] <GC> I casually pin one of the carcases to a nearby tree with some more magic knives.
[23:13] <Spiritcurse> You scavenge the bodies, then hear a loud roar. Despite not speaking bear, you understand it as "If I may interrupt, sir, there is still one bear remaining. However, I may be willing to parley."
[23:14] <Spiritcurse> This bear is significantly larger, easily 10 feet tall. It menaces with spikes of bear.
[23:14] <Dorian> "Goddamn, do we have to fight Archduke Bearington MMXCVIII?"
[23:14] <Spiritcurse> "Roar! Rawwwwwr, roar."
[23:15] <Dorian> "Nobody move. I understand bear."
[23:15] <GC> I look at the pinned up corpse, then at the bear before stating "I didn't do it".
[23:16] <Dorian> I step forward, "We mean you no harm, o great lord of bears, and we shall not fight you if you wish it. We merely wish to obtain the object known as a Planar Conflux."
[23:16] <Spiritcurse> "Rawr rooooar dishonourbru roar. Rawr, rooooar rawr."
[23:19] <Dorian> I smile, and bow, "Thank you, lord bear. I shall take it and leave, giving you the space you need to obtain your greatest and most honourable of goals."
[23:19] <@Tavolk> "What nice bear"
[23:19] <Codex> "Hold on, I think I need to collect the contents of my ass."
[23:19] <Spiritcurse> "Roar! Roar roary roar rawr!"
[23:20] <@Tavolk> "Sure!"
[23:20] <Dorian> "Oh course. I would be no man if I refused."
[23:20] <Furious> "No homo?"
[23:20] <Dorian> "Not at all."
[23:21] <Spiritcurse> "Roar rawr rooooooar Sharn roar roar"
[23:22] <@Tavolk> "Can we do that?"
[23:22] <Spiritcurse> "Roar"
[23:22] <Dorian> "I'm like 90% sure we can just up and move your monestary."
[23:22] <@Tavolk> "I know we can... but can we get it there intact?"
[23:22] <Dorian> "Easily."
[23:23] <@Tavolk> *looks doubtful* "Because everything we do goes well"
[23:24] <Dorian> "All right, I have an idea." I point at Plothole, "You, you're providing movement." I then point at Luo, "You, you're providing area coverage." I then smile, "Me, I'm providing lift and control. Ok, now everyone into the monestary."
[23:25] <GC> "I dont like the sound of this".
[23:25] <Furious> "...Area coverage?"
[23:25] <Spiritcurse> The bear nods and places his paws together. He hums the hum of his people, and several glowing crystals appear before him. "Roar."
[23:25] <@Tavolk> "I'm on it. This could be fun"
[23:26] <Furious> I cast mage hand on one of the crystals and wiggle it around in the air for a bit
[23:26] <Dorian> "Make some wizard mist." I take one of the crystals, and hand one to Plothole. "Take this."
[23:26] <@Tavolk> "thankyou ind sir"
[23:27] <Spiritcurse> As you touch each crystal, it blazes the symbol of a different plane. There seems to be 12 of them.
[23:27] <Dorian> Proceeding with some swagger and taking more of the crystals, I enter the monestary. "Well, come on, then!"
[23:27] <Furious> I cast obscuring mist to cover the castle
[23:27] <@Tavolk> "This is going to be fun"
[23:28] <Furious> I walk into the cloud of mist
[23:28] <@Tavolk> I fllow
[23:28] <GC> I follow
[23:30] <Codex> "It'll be fine."
[23:30] <Codex> I follow.
[23:32] <Dorian> "Ok, Plothole, Luo, grab my hands. We're going to WIZARD shit."
[23:33] <@Tavolk> *With a smile of purest mirth i join hands "Lets do this"
[23:33] <Furious> I think about the repercussions of holding another man's hand for a while, before agreeing
[23:34] <Dorian> "Plothole, focus on magical travel. Luo, focus on covering the area."
[23:34] <Dorian> "Got it?"
[23:34] <Furious> I close my eyes and make sure the cloud obscures the monastery
[23:35] <@Tavolk> *I click once and then tap my foot in a rythm* "mhm"
[23:35] <Dorian> "Good. Then let's begin." I breathe in, then breathe out.
[23:36] <@Tavolk> *I click 3 three more time*
[23:36] <Dorian> "WIZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-"
[23:36] <@Tavolk> "WIZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-"
[23:36] <Furious> "WIZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-"
[23:39] <Spiritcurse> You hear a deep, metallic thrumming, and the scenery changes. You see Sharn before you, and feel yourself hovering there. The university is just before you, the river below, and an incredibly happy dire panda beside you.
[23:39] <Dorian> "-RDS!"
[23:39] <@Tavolk> "-RDS"
[23:39] <Furious> "-RDS"
[23:40] <Dorian> "Right, job well done. I need a nap."
[23:41] <Spiritcurse> You hear a pop, and see a small fireworks display in front of you. It's the dwarven wizard who greeted you before. His beard still glitters.
[23:41] <Spiritcurse> "WONDERFUL JOB! WHAT DID YOU DO?"
[23:41] <Dorian> "Brought you a monestary with a Planar Conflux in it
[23:41] <Spiritcurse> "And a panda."
[23:41] <Dorian> "Well, yes."
[23:41] <@Tavolk> "He's really nice"
[23:41] <Codex> "I think you mean, a Planar McGuffin."
[23:41] <GC> I run to the dwarf, pick him up, and rub my face in his glorious beard.
[23:41] <Dorian> "He is"
[23:41] <Spiritcurse> The panda stares in awe, his jaw lowered. He seems speechless.
[23:42] <Spiritcurse> "WONDERFUL! CUDDLES!"
[23:42] <Dorian> "We're wizards. We do what the fuck we want."
[23:42] <GC> "I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO DIE!!!! THANK GOD YOUR HERE!!!"
[23:42] <@Tavolk> "Can we have the McGuffin now?"
[23:42] <Furious> I sniff the air
[23:42] <Dorian> "Oh, god, why."
[23:42] <Spiritcurse> The panda, still dumbstruck, points towards the inside of the building. He's staring at the dwarf this time.
[23:42] <GC> I put the dwarf back down.
[23:43] <GC> "Hey, back off buddy, thats my father figure!"
[23:43] <Dorian> "Right, fuck this shit, I'm going to space." I sigh, cast Levitate, and ascend.
[23:43] <Spiritcurse> The dwarf notices the panda properly, and returns the dumbstruck stare.
[23:44] <Spiritcurse> You ascend several yards before bumping softly into the building one floating island up.
[23:44] <Dorian> "GODDAMN MOTHER FUCKING FLYING CITIES!!!!!"
[23:44] <Spiritcurse> The dwarf, finally able to speak, utters a single word, still staring at the panda. "D... dad?"
[23:44] <Dorian> I sigh, and head for the monestary again, this time face first. I'm asleep before I hit the ground.
[23:45] <Spiritcurse> They embrace, and teleport away with a soft popping noise.
[23:45] <GC> "HOW COULD YOU BETRAY ME LIKE THIS?!"
[23:45] <Codex> "What the fuck just happened?"
[23:45] <GC> I then pirouette off the floating island.
[23:45] <@Tavolk> "WHERE IS OUR MCGUFFIN"
[23:45] <Furious> "...Just like Bible Camp"
[23:46] <Spiritcurse> You plummet fairly quickly, before landing on the next building down. It's a tavern. A big one.
[23:47] <Codex> "Damn it peer pressure." I follow.
[23:47] <@Tavolk> I jump too pulling Saral with me.
[23:47] <Furious> I cast smoke ladder from the edge of the cliff to the roof of the tavern
[23:47] <GC> I fall through the roof, land on a seat and order a drink in the most nonchalant way possible.
[23:47] <Spiritcurse> You crash gently through the roof, landing flawlessly on seats. A barman raises an eyebrow, before sighing and pouring you several drinks. Each.
[23:48] <Furious> I climb down the ladder and jump through the hole in the roof
[23:48] <@Tavolk> "Thankyou kind sir" then to the others "This is some fun school"
[23:48] <Codex> I cast Repair Construct on the roof, then down my drink.
[23:50] <Spiritcurse> A small corona of light surrounds each one of you in turn, and a patron says "Congrats" before returning to his drink.
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Spiritcurse
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Demi-Assassin

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Re: WIZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!11!!!!!!!!!!!!!!one!!!11!oneone!!1eleven

Post by Spiritcurse on Sun Mar 24, 2013 12:11 am

[21:13] <Spiritcurse> Right. When last we spoke, you'd been drinking heavily, in what was possibly a fourth-wall breaching attempt to mantle the narrator. Ain't gonna fly. Some time passes, and you wake up in your room. This is partly due to your circadian rhythms, but mention must be made of the angry shouting halfling in the doorway. His contribution to your awakening is more than substantial, you feel.
[21:13] <Spiritcurse> "GET DOWN TO THE GREAT HALL THE ARCH-CHANCELLOR WANTS TO SEE YOU RIGHT AWAY GO GO GO GO GO!" he bellows, in what's probably an attempt to compensate for something. He runs away, and you hear him repeat the process in each other room.
[21:15] <@Dorian> I stand up and head for the bathroom.
[21:15] <Tavolk> "but I wanna stay in beeeeeeeedddddddddd" *rolls over and hides under blankets*
[21:15] <GameCrazed> "I wonder what cooked halfling tastes like"
[21:16] <GameCrazed> I get up
[21:16] <Spiritcurse> The bathroom door offers feeble resistance to your arcane might, and you stride victoriously into the bathroom. Greeting you is a bathtub, a toilet, and a sink below a window.
[21:18] <Spiritcurse> Downstairs, you hear a dull thump, a roar of fire, and a screaming halfling. It's going to be a good day.
[21:19] <Codex> "Oh god, my head."
[21:19] <GameCrazed> "COME BACK TASTY SNACK!!!!"
[21:22] <Codex> "Let's move then." I say, getting up.
[21:22] <Tavolk> "We're actually going?" I groan
[21:23] <Codex> I head towards the source of the loud, angry, head-pounding shouting.
[21:23] <GameCrazed> "Aye" I then go and wait at the door.
[21:23] <Tavolk> Seeing people moving about I groan again and sit up.
[21:24] <Tavolk> With a click of my fingers clothing appears and I move tot he door.
[21:24] <Spiritcurse> You follow the trail. It leads down twisting corridors, turning stairwells, and through several dimensions, eventually revealing it's source - a large angry fat man, dressed in red robes, blue in the face with shouting. He appears to be addressing a large audience of students.
[21:25] <Codex> I quietly make my way into the room and join the audience of students.
[21:25] <GameCrazed> As do I.
[21:25] <Tavolk> *catching up to him* "Can I go back to sleep yet...?"
[21:25] <Codex> "Shush."
[21:25] <GameCrazed> "From the looks of the fat man I'd say no".
[21:26] <Tavolk> "Ah. okay" I listen up
[21:27] <@Dorian> I rush to catch up, adjusting my clothes as I do so.
[21:27] <Spiritcurse> His speech, possibly audible from the other side of Sharn, if not Eberron, is clear. "And so, any survivors will be entered into the hall of fame, and given such glory as to be remembered until at least dinner time! Bearing in mind that volunteering is mandatory, any volunteers?"
[21:28] <GameCrazed> "Now we may return to bed".
[21:28] <Codex> "What's this, a death gauntlet?"
[21:28] <Tavolk> "CAN I SLEEP FIRST?"
[21:29] <@Dorian> "I wish to volunteer myself, my friends, and everyone in the school. Nah, I'm kidding, just me and my friends."
[21:29] <Spiritcurse> "No, yes, and no!" he bellows back, and the words echo in a slightly purple font. "GLORIOUS!"
[21:29] <Codex> "I hate Wizardry."
[21:30] <Tavolk> "Awesome!" *I look through the book at my waist... "damnit I don't know sleep..."
[21:30] <GameCrazed> "I wonder what fat man tastes like?"
[21:31] <Spiritcurse> "Now! You glorious volunteers are up against three other teams! If you survive, you represent Morgrave University's first Dreadball champions! For the first round!"
[21:32] <Tavolk> "Oh my. Wonderful. Sports."
[21:32] <@Dorian> "Question: Am I allowed to cast Fist?"
[21:32] <GameCrazed> "I always hated sports day".
[21:33] <Spiritcurse> "This is an open-spell, open-book tournement! Cheating is fully advised!" He gestures to a map, which for narrative convenience, is on the stage with him. "You need to register at the Kobold's Klaw tavern, over there."
[21:34] <Tavolk> "Is getting there going to be harder than we expect? Because everything seems to be so far."
[21:34] <Codex> "What?"
[21:34] <Spiritcurse> "Not at all!" He points out of the window, at a pub with a dead kobold nailed to a sign.
[21:35] <Spiritcurse> "Two streets behind that pub, is the pub you're going to."
[21:35] <Codex> "Let's get moving before we're told the rest of the rules."
[21:35] <@Dorian> "Ok, then. I'm going to need a sword, a red coat, a red hat with a wide floppy brim and a white feather in it, and some pimp clothes."
[21:36] <GameCrazed> "CLOTHES! I knew I forgot something!"
[21:37] <GameCrazed> I look down noting my lack of clothing.
[21:37] <Spiritcurse> The archchancellor points to the dean. "You're not the only one, don't worry! Now, go! For the glory of... the faculty!"
[21:37] <GameCrazed> I punch a nearby student in the neck before stealing their clothes.
[21:38] <GameCrazed> "Good enough"
[21:38] <Spiritcurse> "YOU'RE PERFECT!" he bellows. Several students in the front rows simply cease to be. The dean mutters "volume, archchancellor..."
[21:41] <Tavolk> *not wanting to be here anymore incase of more volume 'errors' i tug at everyones sleeves* "Lets go?"
[21:41] <Codex> "Yes, we're leaving now."
[21:42] <GameCrazed> I bow, "AND AWAY I GO!" before performing a pirouette so glimmeringly magnificent any nearby students should watch their heart strings.
[21:42] <Spiritcurse> Several male students wink back at you. The faculty vanish in unison, each a small puff of rainbow sparks.
[21:44] <Spiritcurse> Outside, there are the familiar streets of Sharn, complete with petty street theft, magic, lack of moral direction, and thankfully, several taverns. The afficionados of any part of kobold physiology would be happy.
[21:45] <@Dorian> I head for the Kobold's Klaw tavern, wizardry in hand and bitching clothes on bitching body.
[21:45] <Tavolk> *looking at the nearest sign* "Recycling at it's best"
[21:45] <GameCrazed> I follow in the clothing I am beginning to realise was meant for a heavily endowed woman.
[21:45] <Codex> "Okay, be careful not to have your swag tuned too high, it needs to be on Moderate - High, any higher will attract too much attention."
[21:46] <Spiritcurse> You approach a tavern, this one nicely illuminated by purple crystals hovering in the air, and decorated with the viscera of any race moving slower than the landlord.
[21:47] <Tavolk> "Anyone else think these crystals areatracting those who cast with the 'other' wands? If you know what I mean?"
[21:48] <Spiritcurse> The bouncer looks at you, mutters "detect swag" under his breath, then, apparently satisfied, nods to you. "No higher, lads."
[21:49] <Codex> "Got it." I say, moving into the pub.
[21:50] <GameCrazed> I stear into his eyes, move close to his face, click my fingers in his face and shout "WIZARD BITCHES!" before running into the tavern giggling like a school girl.
[21:50] <Spiritcurse> Inside, you see several groups of wizards, apparently engaged in a large scale drinking contest. There appear to be members of several groups here, judging by the robes.
[21:53] <Spiritcurse> Reading the robes, you identify "Sora Kel's Killers", "Cannith Crushers", and "Denieth Deniers". They're quite stylish robes, custom fitted.
[21:54] <GameCrazed> I approach the bar, rest my arm on the table and say "cooked halfling sweetheart, roasted not boiled".
[21:55] <Codex> "You eat that shit?"
[21:55] <Codex> "I can't stomach it."
[21:55] <Tavolk> *tries to make himself look taller*
[21:55] <GameCrazed> "I HAVENT EATEN SINCE WE GOT TO THE COLLEGE, MY STOMACH IS 1 BOWEL MOVEMENT AWAY FROM TOTAL IMPLOSION!"
[21:56] <Spiritcurse> The dwarf behind the bar lowers his voice, quite an impressive feat, given how low he was already. "The keyword? You can tell Korinth he's never getting his money!" The dwarf turns and sprints through the kitchens, and you hear him kick open a door.
[21:56] <GameCrazed> "I WILL EAT WHAT I DAMN WELL PLEASE!"
[21:56] <Codex> "... Boner, why?"
[21:56] <@Dorian> "Give me a Tuna Melt Pannini with Avoccado and Hummus, please. Oh, and a Mt. Noob Pale Ale."
[21:56] <@Dorian> "Wait, what?"
[21:57] <Spiritcurse> A waitress turns to you. "He's a little on edge now. We'll find him soon. I'll bring that to your table."
[21:58] <GameCrazed> "Splendid". i then move to find a table.
[21:58] <Spiritcurse> There is one table left, reserved for Morgrave University. It's got half a dozen seats, none of which are on fire.
[21:59] <Codex> I sit at the table, trying to think of a team name.
[21:59] <@Dorian> I sigh at my companion's incompetence and sit down.
[21:59] <Codex> "Morgrave Mashers?"
[22:00] <Codex> "Tits and Explosions?"
[22:00] <Tavolk> *sitting on a chair* "I feel something beyond the fourth wall trying to warn us of some impending doom"
[22:00] <Spiritcurse> You hear a few sniggers from the other teams, but the mild shame is eclipsed by the arrival of your sandwich.
[22:00] <GameCrazed> I also sit at the table before begining to re-arrange the clothing which I now realise consists of bloomers, stockings and an ill fitting pink bathrobe.
[22:01] <@Dorian> I take my sandwich and begin eating it with much gusto.
[22:02] <Tavolk> *swaggerific5000 begins displaying on my head*
[22:02] <Tavolk> "I have a name for us"
[22:03] <Codex> "Tsndere Tsunamis?"
[22:03] <Spiritcurse> This is a sandwich. All craftswaitressship is of the highest quality. It menaces with spikes of tuna.
[22:04] <Codex> "Anyway, let's decide."
[22:05] <@Dorian> "We could be called the Lords of Cat?"
[22:05] <Tavolk> "Kitty crusaders?"
[22:05] <GameCrazed> "WENCH!!! WHERES MY HALFLING?!?!"
[22:05] <Codex> "It's better than Titties and Kitties."
[22:06] <@Dorian> "DRINK!!!!!!"
[22:06] <Tavolk> "I... I like this."
[22:06] <Spiritcurse> A halfling from the Cannith Crushers glares at you.
[22:06] <Tavolk> *clicks fingers* *Downs lusiary drink*
[22:06] <Codex> I wink.
[22:06] <Tavolk> *licks the nearest window*
[22:06] <GameCrazed> I look at the halfling before licking my lips.
[22:07] <@Dorian> I wink at the Halfling.
[22:08] <Spiritcurse> The halfling bites their lip and glances away before returning to their drink.
[22:08] <Codex> "So, what are choosing? Let's vote."
[22:09] <Tavolk> *titties and kitties displays on my HUD*
[22:09] <GameCrazed> "Titties and Kitties" I say raising my hand
[22:10] <Codex> "Titties and Kitties."
[22:10] <@Dorian> I sigh, "Just let me eat my sandwich and drink my Ale."
[22:10] <Spiritcurse> At the decision of your group name, it blares across the table in rainbow font, and an elf in a striped black and white shirt walks up to you. "CONGRATULATIONS, TITTIES AND KITTIES! You've drawn Denieth Deniers in the next round! Get moving, and try not to die!"
[22:10] <Codex> "Can anyone put this on the back of our ro--"
[22:10] <Tavolk> *Clicks* "done"
[22:11] <GameCrazed> "WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENCH!!!!!"
[22:11] <@Dorian> I stand up, finish my booze and snadwich with incredible speed, and grab a random longsword from someone near by."
[22:12] <Spiritcurse> The Denieth Deniers stand and head to a ladder into the basement. "See you inside, suckers!", the leader shouts.
[22:12] <Codex> "Better ask for it in a bag or something."
[22:12] <GameCrazed> Out of anger I set the mentally deficient Wench on fire before devowering her in one bite.
[22:13] <Spiritcurse> The waitress raises her eyebrow and serves another table.
[22:13] <GameCrazed> I then approach the bar and put my cooked halfling in one of my gowns pockets.
[22:14] <@Dorian> I start to head downstairs, readying my weaponry and wizardry.
[22:14] <Spiritcurse> A slightly baked halfling enters your pocket. "Duuuude... drop me off at home then?" he mutters, before falling asleep.
[22:14] <Codex> "Where do we--"
[22:14] <Codex> "Right, let's go."
[22:15] <Tavolk> "Onward. And then we can sleep"
[22:15] <Codex> I climb down, after my ally."
[22:15] <Tavolk> *yawns*
[22:15] <Spiritcurse> The basement contains two portals - a red one, and a blue one. The referee guides you to the blue portal and asks "Any of you played Dreadball before?"
[22:16] <Codex> "Nope."
[22:16] <Tavolk> "No. What are the 'rules' " I hand quote around the word rules
[22:16] <Spiritcurse> "Rules are simple. Get the shiny in the middle of the cave. Don't die. Understand?"
[22:16] <GameCrazed> "With a whore once but I dout this is the same event".
[22:17] <Codex> "On a scale of one to The Keeper, How dead are we?"
[22:17] <Spiritcurse> "Not dead. Not dead at all. Just gotta get shiny."
[22:17] <Codex> "Oh alright,
[22:17] <GameCrazed> "Is the shiny cursed?"
[22:17] <Spiritcurse> "Nope. Shiny is just shiny."
[22:17] <Tavolk> *suddenly looking more perky and shouting* "Shinies?" *after a moment "sorry about that... my mother was one eigth kobold"
[22:18] <GameCrazed> "Good, I we find otherwise I will beat you with my halfling".
[22:18] <Spiritcurse> While talking to the gentlemen, you get the feeling that it's actually two kobolds stood on each other's shoulders. "Now, go! Bring back shiny!"
[22:19] <@Dorian> "Ok, then." I sigh, before entering the magical realm.
[22:19] <Codex> "It'll be fine. Nothing could possibly go wrong."
[22:19] <GameCrazed> I glare at the kobold then follow.
[22:20] <Tavolk> "magical realms. and shiny objects. Fun"
[22:20] <Tavolk> *jumps*
[22:21] <Spiritcurse> Through the portal is a small stone room. The walls are peppered with small holes, and the floor appears to be a large chessboard. Several statues are placed on seemingly random squares. There's a door, naturally, on the other side.
[22:21] <Spiritcurse> A flickering blue crystal illuminates the room.
[22:22] <GameCrazed> "FUCK IT!" I turn around and look for the portal.
[22:22] <Spiritcurse> The portal's no longer here. One way portals are fun.
[22:22] <@Dorian> I sigh, and cast detect magic.
[22:23] <Codex> I cast Lucky Cape on my own Cape.
[22:23] <Spiritcurse> Looking for magical auras, you see very little. Possibly a faint web of lines beneath the floor, linking the panels to the holes.
[22:24] <Spiritcurse> Your knowledge of patterns and puzzles reveals that it's possibly a game of Jenga.
[22:24] <Codex> "Don't. Knock over. Anything."
[22:25] <@Dorian> I focus my mind and begin to attempt to dispell stuff.
[22:25] <Spiritcurse> The webs flare, then some of them vanish.
[22:27] <Tavolk> *with a grin* "Hoenheim, throw your meal at that door quickly, I'll give it you back"
[22:28] <GameCrazed> I raise the halfling in my hand. Aim at the door and hurl the sleeping halfling at the door.
[22:28] <@Dorian> I cast Pass Without Trace and walk at the door.
[22:29] <Spiritcurse> The halfling lands with a thump roughly 6 tiles down. A barrage of darts shoots from both sides, briefly, thankfully missing the midget.
[22:29] <GameCrazed> "Fuck, that better not poison my meal".
[22:29] <Codex> "It's flavour."
[22:30] <GameCrazed> "its also deadly"
[22:30] <Tavolk> "A nice bit of seasoning"
[22:30] <GameCrazed> "For me that is"
[22:32] <@Dorian> I pick up the terrified midget wizard and place him on a tile that is the opposite colour to the one the Halfling landed on.
[22:32] <Spiritcurse> He lands, perfectly alive and well.
[22:33] <@Dorian> I cast Jump and launch myself over the chess board.
[22:33] *** Dark (Dark@sux-DFC12BC4.cable.virginmedia.com) joined
[22:35] <Spiritcurse> You land one tile before the end, get clipped by a single dart, but collapse outside the chessboard.
[22:36] <Tavolk> *with a click of my fingers I approach a wall and climb up it like somekind of friendly nearby wizzard-man*
[22:36] <Codex> I cast Bear's Strength on Hohenheim.
[22:37] <GameCrazed> I cast Spider Legs and grow the appropriate number of wall traversing limbs
[22:37] <Codex> "Nothing will go wrong with this plan."
[22:38] <GameCrazed> I pick up the remaining members of the team and traverse the room via the roof in order to avoid the deadly deadly poison.
[22:38] <GameCrazed> "ILL RETURN SOME DAY TASTY SNACK!!!"
[22:38] <Spiritcurse> You arrive at the door, mostly unpoisoned! The slightly baked halfling stares at his hands.
[22:40] <Codex> "Brilliantly executed. Let's try the door."
[22:40] <Tavolk> "WAIT THERE MY SMALLFRIEND"
[22:40] <Tavolk> I follow Penny closely
[22:40] <@Dorian> I kick the door in
[22:41] <@Dorian> With Wizardry
[22:41] <Codex> "Was it unlocked?"
[22:41] <Dark> Giveing a large but mute yawn, the stuffed head of the bear slowly appears out of the pocket it had been sleeping in. Its fake black eyes looking around as it ties to work out how the hell it got here...
[22:42] <Spiritcurse> The door, being an unlocked push-to-open door, flies open. Beyonds is a large cave, separated from the other side by a large lava river. You sense people watching you from the other side.
[22:43] <Tavolk> "TEDDY!"
[22:43] <Tavolk> *I grab the bear*
[22:43] <Codex> "Hey little guy, We're doing a death trial."
[22:43] <Codex> "Try not to die."
[22:43] <Dark> The bear gives a look that simply reads "Oh of course we are"
[22:44] <GameCrazed> "Out of random curiosity little man, are you fireproof?
[22:44] <Spiritcurse> A booming voice echoes from the ceiling. "We's gonna put shiny in soon! You's both in 'ere, so you's gots ta fight!"
[22:44] <Dark> The bear shakes its head and pats its fur
[22:45] <Tavolk> *keeps hold of the teddy*
[22:45] <Dark> Looking up, the bear gives you a slow nod
[22:46] <@Dorian> I sigh, and cast Suggestion at the stupidest looking member of the other team, "I suggest you fight to the death with your friends, winner gets beer and money."
[22:47] <Spiritcurse> You hear a small laugh, and five figures stand up from behind rocks. One of them glitters as they deflect your spell. Each are holding deadly looking longbows.
[22:48] <@Dorian> "ALRIGHT. FUCK ALL OF YOU RIGHT THE FUCK NOW!" I cast a hellish version of Magic Missile at them.
[22:49] *** Dark quit (Quit: HydraIRC -> http://www.hydrairc.com <- Chicks dig it)
[22:50] <Spiritcurse> They each recoil in horror, then two of them fire their bows at you.
[22:51] <Spiritcurse> One arrow hits you in the shoulder, for a minor amount of damage.
[22:54] <GameCrazed> I raise my hands and in a mighty gesture, point at the ground in the middle of the group. the point at which i gesture at erupts into a 100ft swirling sandstorm. i proceed to shout "HABOOOOOOOOB!!!!!!!!"
[22:55] <Tavolk> *I grin* "I know how to finish this"
[22:55] <Spiritcurse> You hear several shouts, and two men stagger out of the sandstorm, firing bows at the pink-robed man.
[22:58] <Codex> I pull out a glowing Dragonshard and quickly enchant with Spell Snare. I then step out infront of my party.
[22:58] <Spiritcurse> Another archer stumbles from the sandstorm, firing a shot at the magic missile gentlemen.
[22:59] <Tavolk> "Fireball"
[23:01] <Tavolk> with the word a ball of fire flies from my outstretched hand towards the men.
[23:02] <Spiritcurse> One archer collapses in a large fire, while two merely survive with horrific burning and scars.
[23:02] <Tavolk> As the fire engulfs them I laugh and say one thing "Wizard, bitches"
[23:04] <Spiritcurse> A trophy is lowered from the ceiling inside a large iron cage. You hear the giggling of several kobolds from above. It's currently about 20 feet above the ravine in the middle of the room.
[23:05] <@Dorian> I thrust out my hand at one of the people and unleash a blast of necromantic energy at them.
[23:08] <Spiritcurse> The face of the target flares with a blue light, and the spell snare gem glows the same shade.
[23:10] <Spiritcurse> The blast catches each one in the chest, and two of them are killed. Two more fall to the ground, while another fires another arrow towards the magic missle mage.
[23:10] <@Dorian> I raise a finger in contempt. Specifically the middle one.
[23:13] <GameCrazed> I aim at the weakest and most exposed archer and hurl a bolt of darkness towards its head.
[23:16] <Spiritcurse> You are treated to a grisly scene, as layers of his soul are stripped away, leaving his husk behind. It collapses to the ground, slipping into the lava.
[23:17] <Codex> "Boner, why?"
[23:17] <@Dorian> I sigh, and mage hand the shiny into my hand.
[23:18] <Codex> "gg."
[23:18] <Spiritcurse> The shiny drifts gently into your hands, and you hear a faint yell from the other side of the room. "W... wait!" You hear the sounds of penmanship, and then a paper tied to a rock is thrown across.
[23:19] <Tavolk> "nope."
[23:19] <Codex> "Yeah, I'm not reading any exploding runes today."
[23:19] <Tavolk> "My thoughts exactly"
[23:19] <Codex> "Just shout what you have to say."
[23:19] <GameCrazed> "Someone push it off the edge".
[23:19] <@Dorian> I cast Tenacious Dispelling on the paper.
[23:20] <Codex> I back away.
[23:21] <GameCrazed> I hide in a corner
[23:21] <Tavolk> *Is still behind Codex*
[23:21] <Spiritcurse> "I said explosive runes, fuckers"
[23:22] <Tavolk> "WHY YOU LITTLE" fireball
[23:22] <Codex> "Summon them a friend."
[23:23] <Tavolk> as the blast engulfs them "I said WIZAAAARRRDDDD bitches"
[23:23] <Codex> "What a friendly Fireball."
[23:23] <Spiritcurse> You hear kobold voices from above - "Kekeke, denieth tricksy!", "Supur tricksy! Yarkar's gon like dat lot."
[23:23] <Spiritcurse> Screams of firely delight erupt from the other side of the room. And by delight, I mean death.
[23:25] <GameCrazed> I pull a face at the dying men before cackling maniacally.
[23:25] <Codex> "We done then? Do we turn back?"
[23:25] <Tavolk> "Yes. Yes we do"
[23:25] <Spiritcurse> "You's won! Welcom to rownd too! Yays!" A soft blue light engulfs you, and you find yourself back in the tavern.
[23:26] <Tavolk> "Now who do I get to kill" Plothole is clearly more awake now
[23:26] <@Dorian> "Question: Do we get our Wizardry back?"
[23:26] <Spiritcurse> "Com bak tomorow! You's gots der Canif Crushurs!" One kobold says, abandoning all pretence of being a real referee.
[23:27] <Spiritcurse> The Cannith halfling, hearing this, looks towards your party, blushes a deep red. She turns to her books, reads a line, and vanishes.
[23:28] <GameCrazed> "I look forward to eating that ass"
[23:28] <Codex> "Sorry, what?"
[23:28] <Codex> "Was that a spelling error?"
[23:28] <Tavolk> "If they wake me up again. SOMEONES GETTING INCINERATED."
[23:28] <GameCrazed> "I am quite partial to hot, steamy halfling ass"
[23:29] <Spiritcurse> A chronogrammatician, high in their ivory tower, looks in your general direction and sighs, sadly.
[23:29] <Tavolk> "I say we deal with them now. SO I can have a lie in"
[23:29] <@Dorian> "Wait, where's the nearest Canith pad? We could easily burn it down."
[23:29] <Codex> "Like, baked or..?"
[23:29] <GameCrazed> "Either or"
[23:29] <Codex> "Right.
[23:29] <Tavolk> "I have an app for that"
[23:29] <Tavolk> "I MEAN SPELL"
[23:29] <Tavolk> *clicks fingers*
[23:30] <Tavolk> *a baked halfling appears*
[23:30] <GameCrazed> I begin to eat it ravenously
[23:30] <GameCrazed> Ass first of course
[23:30] <Tavolk> "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO DAAAAVVVVEEEEE"
[23:30] <Codex> "Poor guy."
[23:31] <Spiritcurse> The halfling, at first uncomfortable with your attentions, shrugs and makes himself comfortable. "Bin through worse, innit?"
[23:31] <GameCrazed> "Wut?" I say with a te still protruding from my mouth.
[23:31] <GameCrazed> *toe
[23:31] <Tavolk> "Guess he took gender choice 'elf' "
[23:31] <Spiritcurse> "Halflings grow back, don't they?"
[23:32] <Codex> "Err,"
[23:32] <@Dorian> I walk up to the Halfling and whisper "No they don't."
[23:33] <Spiritcurse> The halfling looks a little put-off for a few moments, then regains his composure. "Eh, win some, lose some."
[23:33] <Codex> "Good man."
[23:34] <Codex> "Anyway, let's get some rest and prepare for tomorrow, I need to go shopping."
[23:35] <GameCrazed> "and I need to find my clothes"
[23:35] <GameCrazed> I look down and notice I am naked once again.
[23:35] <GameCrazed> "GOD DAMMIT!"
[23:36] <Spiritcurse> You notice a large, seemingly half-orc man climbing out of one of the back windows, your clothes in hand. He bellows "TOO SUBTLE" before running away with deafening irony.
[23:36] <GameCrazed> I cast cure serious wounds on myself before I forget.
[23:36] <Codex> "I'm so confused."
[23:36] <@Dorian> "GODDAMN WEREBOAR ASSASSINS!"
[23:37] <GameCrazed> I begin looking for a nearby exposed neck.
[23:38] <Codex> I pull up the colar of my sailor shirt.
[23:39] <Spiritcurse> You see several exposed necks throughout the bar. Most of them are used as efficient linkages between heads and torsos.
[23:40] <GameCrazed> Learning from my previous error I locate a man of similar build before hitting him over the head with a halfling and stealing his clothing.
[23:41] <Codex> "I need equipment, so I'm going shopping. Catch up if you need anything and aren't being chased by an authority figure of some kind.
[23:42] <Spiritcurse> The man collapses to the ground, and the bar goes silent. You hear the noise of several weapons being grabbed.
[23:42] <GameCrazed> I return to the group bearing the result of my most recent endevor.
[23:42] <Codex> I leave.
[23:42] <@Dorian> I follow Penny, "I'm buying shit as well, and ignoring the idiot who just attacked someone."
[23:43] <@Dorian> "Oh, if they follow us, we're not with them."
[23:43] <GameCrazed> I look around, throw the man a penny and flee for my life out the nearest window.
[23:44] <Tavolk> With a click of my fingers I poof next to the party. with sparkles and rainbows
[23:44] <Spiritcurse> Your path to the window is blocked by several large men, including the Sora Kel Killers. One of them raises a large meat cleaver.
[23:45] <GameCrazed> "Gentlemen, allow me to pleasure you with my body". I then run out the door.
[23:47] <Spiritcurse> As you run, most everyone in the bar takes a swing for you. One catches you hard in the back of the head.
[23:50] <Spiritcurse> You get outside, back on to the street. You hear shouting behind you.
[23:54] <GameCrazed> I run back to the wizard colledge
[23:54] <Spiritcurse> Using a few shortcuts, you manage to get inside the grounds before being killed or arrested.
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Spiritcurse
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Re: WIZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!11!!!!!!!!!!!!!!one!!!11!oneone!!1eleven

Post by DorianCreed on Sun Mar 31, 2013 1:23 am

[21:26] <@Spirit> When last we met, you were fleeing a bar after your rites to praise the chaotic retard entities of the outer planes went wrong, causing the ire of the populace. One can only assume you went to drink afterwards, at one of another bars with a dismembered kobold decorating its sign. It is now the dead of night, and you have a competition in the morning. Where lesser participants may sleep, you surely
[21:26] <@Spirit> have other plans.
[21:29] <Dorian> "Alright. I believe we were discussing breaking into a Cannith enclave. Thoughts?"
[21:31] <GameCrazed> I rejoin the group looking slightly different, however the differences are hard to distinguish.
[21:32] <Furious> I rejoin the group looking completely fucking confused.
[21:32] <Dorian> "What's up?"
[21:33] <GameCrazed> "Ah most excellent it appears that most of us are alive!"
[21:35] <tavolk> MORNING!
[21:35] <Codex> "Most of us."
[21:35] <Codex> "Only about 50% of myself I'm afraid."
[21:35] <tavolk> I look... then realise that looking like I should say good morning isn't usefull I say outloud "morning"
[21:36] <Furious> "What's going on here? I appear to have 'forgotten' what happened after we teleported the monastery."
[21:37] <tavolk> "We drank... then erm... We entered a competition II think... the frequent drinks are nubing my ever so sharp mind..."
[21:37] <Dorian> "Yeah, you and your 'sharp' mind got us caught up in the competition."
[21:38] <tavolk> "I just wanted to sleep. I never asked for this."
[21:39] <Codex> I stiffle a laugh.
[21:39] <Furious> "Brilliant" I enter the Hunter's Sense stance and begin to sniff the air.
[21:39] <Codex> "Cannith" I say aloud. "How do we find them?"
[21:39] <Codex> "Oh for fu--"
[21:39] <@Spirit> The air smells of alcohol and alcohol. It menaces with spikes of alcohol.
[21:39] <tavolk> "Smell anything interesting?"
[21:40] <Furious> "Yes."
[21:40] <GameCrazed> "Do you regret it?"
[21:40] <tavolk> "Huh.. makes a change"
[21:42] <tavolk> "So. Cannith. Lets go hamstring them so we can go back to sleep sooner?"
[21:42] <Furious> "Unfortunately I don't smell any of those. Could be to do with the amount of alcohol in here"
[21:43] <Dorian> "Then let's go outside and burn the alcohol off then try again."
[21:43] <tavolk> "Smell for crystals. If we boast about our plans to destroy the Canith crystals surely someone will turn up to stop us?"
[21:45] <tavolk> "First we should form some kind of cult..."
[21:45] <Codex> "I'm not getting in another cult."
[21:45] <Dorian> "Oooor we burn the place to the ground, take and reprogram the Warforged, then steal all the weaponry and Power Gloves."
[21:45] <Codex> "They're a pain in the ass. I'm sure someone will know, let's look around, anyone look Cannith here to you?"
[21:46] *** tavolk quit (Quit: http://www.mibbit.com ajax IRC Client)
[21:47] <@Spirit> Looking around the tavern, you see a couple of warforged, a human with what might be a dragonmark, and a halfling with a crossbow roughly his size, covered in... things. Gears and cogs and shit.
[21:47] *** tavolk (56a1040f@sux-775C1CDB.mibbit.com) joined
[21:48] <Furious> I begin wonder why anyone would smear shit on their crossbow.
[21:49] <tavolk> "That halfling might know something about Canith?"
[21:49] <Codex> "You're up sleepy."
[21:51] <Dorian> I strut up to the Halfling, "Good day, sir, might you direct us to the Cannith enclave? I am looking to purchase some fine magictech weaponry."
[21:53] <@Spirit> The halfling raises an eyebrow, and shrugs. "New around here? Just follow the signs - left out of here, keep walking until you see the massive bronze and blue gates."
[21:54] <Dorian> "Thank you very much."
[21:54] <Dorian> I turn to my... 'friends', for want of a better word. "Let's go."
[21:54] <GameCrazed> "Wonderful"
[21:55] <tavolk> "Well atleast if we get this done we can all go home"
[21:55] <Codex> I follow everyone out of the pub. Bar. Tavern. Thing.
[21:55] <tavolk> *I rise and quickly down the contents of my flagon*
[21:56] <Furious> I dive out of the door and follow the group
[21:57] <@Spirit> Now suitably inebriated, you're probably ready to sneak into a well-guarded enclave populated by the most proficient warriors in the city. Oh wait, no you're not. But you're still doing it.
[21:57] <tavolk> "ONWARD! To adventure. Then promptly to sleep"
[21:57] <@Spirit> A few hundred yards down the road, you see some gates made out of bronze, decorated with a blue bull's head.
[21:59] <tavolk> "Whatdo?"
[21:59] <Furious> I sniff the air
[22:00] <GameCrazed> "Can't we just walk in?"
[22:00] <GameCrazed> "it seems to work everywhere else"
[22:00] <tavolk> "We do tend to over think things. Lets try it"
[22:00] <Dorian> "Walk in, burn the place down, walk out? Nah, boys. It;s time for STEALTH."
[22:00] <Codex> "Oh shit."
[22:00] <@Spirit> It smells of natural city air. Damn son, read the Scent ability. The gates are guarded, but unlocked. It is, after all, a mercantile district, and your request to buy powerful weaponry is hardly uncommon at night.
[22:01] <tavolk> "We stroll in. We do our thing. We loot. We stroll out with goods looking like we got them"
[22:02] <Furious> I walk up to a guard and nod to him, before continuing through the gates
[22:03] <tavolk> "Awwww damn." I follow
[22:03] <Dorian> I sigh, and follow him in, smiling at the guards.
[22:04] <@Spirit> The guard barely notices, and your stealthy entrance is complete. Who needs Rogues?
[22:04] <tavolk> "Wonderfull. How are we finding this team?"
[22:04] <Codex> I follow, wondering if I can find some more cogs and shit for my crossbow.
[22:05] <@Spirit> Inside the enclave, you see several wondrous, breathtaking, mystical sights. Platforms support magical item stores, glowing crystals provide illumination, and narrow stone walkways built by giants connect equally giant towers together. It's basically Sharn as normal, but with a bull's head in bronze set everywhere.
[22:07] <Codex> "Nice."
[22:07] <Furious> "So... what exactly did we need from here again? I forgot"
[22:07] <Codex> "You know what, you guys do your thing, I'm going buying cogs and shit."
[22:09] <GameCrazed> "I want a hat of disguise"
[22:09] <tavolk> "I'm going to get the job done."
[22:10] <@Spirit> You see multiple stores nearby, several advertising their supplies for artifice. You also see a tavern, one of the few without a dismembered reptile outside, and of course, the ever-present towers.
[22:10] <tavolk> I stroll off towards the tavern
[22:11] <Codex> "Wait a moment,"
[22:11] <tavolk> "huh?"
[22:11] <GameCrazed> I go in search of my hat of disguise.
[22:11] <Codex> "If we just go straight there, we won't be able to exit looking like happy customers."
[22:11] <GameCrazed> I stop "yes?
[22:11] <Codex> "Be subtle. Acquire things."
[22:12] <GameCrazed> "Subtltlety is my middle name"
[22:12] <tavolk> "I'm aquiring drinks. Then when you guys have shopped I'll hang around you."
[22:12] <Codex> "Right."
[22:12] <Dorian> "Let's do this, then." I smile, aiming for the shops in search of a working Hand of the Mage.
[22:12] <GameCrazed> "Aye" on that word i continue my search.
[22:12] <Furious> "Gotcha" I say, before slipping and knocking over a stack of crates.
[22:13] <@Spirit> Your search lasts exactly seven seconds. After which, you realise that you're standing in the house of making, and that, were any legitimate shops open, you could have one in seconds.
[22:14] <@Spirit> From the tavern, you hear a loud musical beat. A large warforged bars entry to the door.
[22:15] <tavolk> "HAIL!" I yell to the warforged "What's going on in there?" I gesture to the inn
[22:16] <Codex> "So much for subtle. Let's try get in."
[22:16] <Dorian> "Too subtle for me." I mutter, before wandering off in search of what appears to be nothing much.
[22:16] <@Spirit> "Leaden Ornithopter concert. You got tickets?"
[22:18] <GameCrazed> "How much?"
[22:18] <@Spirit> "Couple o' silver."
[22:18] <tavolk> "Hey, Its fine. I got this" with a subtle click I pull some tickets from behind my back
[22:19] <tavolk> I fan the tickets
[22:20] <@Spirit> The warforged, were he endowed with eyebrows, would raise one mockingly. As it is, he recognizes the somatic and verbal components of a spell. "Friend, I work in an enchanter's guild."
[22:21] <tavolk> "Damn. Can't blame a guy for trying" I chuckle and lean in to the guy "Any way we can get in for cheaper?"
[22:21] <Codex> "For fucks sake,"
[22:21] <Codex> I pull out a gold coin.
[22:21] <Codex> "No wait, I can't math."
[22:21] <tavolk> "Okay." *hands over the money, tipping generously*
[22:21] <Codex> I pull out a second."
[22:21] <@Spirit> "That'll do, ta. In yer go." He takes the coins, dropping them in a small slot in his chest.
[22:22] <tavolk> I enter the inn
[22:22] <Codex> "I've heard good things about this band."
[22:22] <Furious> I barge in and grab the nearest patron
[22:22] <Codex> I say to the rest as I enter the place.
[22:23] <tavolk> "Thought they acended to deities while slaying demons in a volcano... Clearly I was told wrong"
[22:24] <@Spirit> You enter what appears to be a layer of the abyss. At least a hundred members of various races appear to be dancing, or at least shoving in time to the beat. Several bards perform on stage, to the frankly excessive background of lightning, thunder, and colours coming from several instruments.
[22:25] <@Spirit> You grab out, catching a dwarf by the beard. He, or possibly she, winks at you before continuing to 'dance'.
[22:26] <Furious> I yell, over the music, to the dwarf "What am I supposed to be doing here"
[22:26] <Codex> "We're trying to find the people who are in the competition tomorrow"
[22:26] <GameCrazed> I begin to enjoy myself. Afterall, we could all die tomorrow.
[22:26] <@Spirit> The dwarf giggles, and drunkenly replies "Me, if you're lucky". Given that drunken is the ground state of being for dwarves, you deduce this one to be inebriated indeed.
[22:27] <Furious> I throw the dwarf to the side, and being to push through the crowd looking for likely suspects
[22:29] <@Spirit> Searching around, you see a warforged you somewat recognize. It appears to have changed somewhat, mostly due to the application of glowing ooze in tribal patterns.
[22:30] <@Spirit> I hope I don't need to explicitly state the name of the dance it's performing. It's too obvious. Not nearly... subtle enough for you.
[22:30] <tavolk> "What odd dancing"
[22:30] <tavolk> "What do guys?" I say indicating the warforged
[22:31] <GameCrazed> "Kill it with fire"
[22:32] <tavolk> "Not yet? Any other plans?"
[22:33] <Furious> I point a finger at the warforged across the room and begin to whisper something
[22:34] <Codex> "No, don't."
[22:34] <Codex> "We just need to drink them under the table."
[22:34] <Codex> "They'll be hungover, we'll have potions."
[22:37] <Furious> I whisper "The best kind of interview is one in which the applicant does not know they are being observed. Meet us behind the inn."
[22:38] *** tavolk quit (Quit: http://www.mibbit.com ajax IRC Client)
[22:39] *** tavolk (56a1040f@sux-D7D2E6A7.mibbit.com) joined
[22:39] <@Spirit> The warforged pauses his dancing and stands up. He looks around for a while, then nudges a halfling with his foot and mutters a few words. She nods and fades into the crowd, almost literally. He then walks towards the bar.
[22:42] <tavolk> "What now boys?"
[22:43] <Furious> I keep an eye on the warforged, while I move to the edge of the crowd and find an empty seat
[22:43] <Codex> "I don't know, he's not in a place I can get to him subtly anymore."
[22:44] <Furious> I gesture to the others to come and sit with me at the table
[22:44] <tavolk> "What did you say?" I say to the sword man
[22:44] <Codex> I follow without a word, trying to spot where to halfling went.
[22:45] <@Spirit> After a few moments, the barman comes to serve the warforged, and the two start talking in a huhed whisper.
[22:45] <@Spirit> You don't catch a glimpse of the halfling, especially in such circumstances. She doesn't seem to have been trampled, which is good.
[22:47] <Furious> I say to the rest of the group "Right guys, I told him to meet us behind the bar, but he might be onto us. Be on your guard", as I continue to watch the warforged.
[22:48] <tavolk> "Okay."
[22:49] <GameCrazed> "Are we all ready?"
[22:49] <tavolk> With a click I cast glitterdust.
[22:49] <tavolk> Shiny particles float down from the roof.Covering everything. MAKING IT SHINY
[22:50] <@Spirit> The crowd goes wild. The band, professionals to a fault, simply engages a slightly more metal guitar riff.
[22:50] <Codex> Pretty metal.
[22:51] <@Spirit> We're at least at mithril tier here.
[22:55] *** Spirit quit (Ping timeout)
[22:55] <Codex> The fourth wall fades out of existance.
[22:56] <Codex> "Oh god, what the fuck."
[22:56] *** Spirit (Spirit@sux-679D6114.mcr-bng-012.adsl.virginmedia.net) joined
[22:56] <Codex> The fourth wall fades back into existance. Oopsy daisy.
[22:56] <Spirit> You feel a sense of impending doom. A cruel and malevolent being has resurfaced.
[22:57] <tavolk> "shit."
[22:58] <Spirit> The being urges you to carry on as normal, certain that its tenuous grasp on the plane will not be interrupted by him trippling over the silver cord as he goes to fetch a mana potion.
[22:58] <tavolk> "Ah. gotcha." *returning to normality*
[22:58] <tavolk> "Well that should make people easier to spot"
[22:59] <Furious> I continue to watch the warforged and the barman converse, trying really hard to lip-read but failing because I am inattentive.
[23:01] <Spirit> You sense that something's not quite right, but sure enough, the warforged exits after a while. The door closes itself after a few seconds.
[23:02] <GameCrazed> "I think that's our que"
[23:02] <Furious> "Okay, he's probably going round to the back of the inn now, let's follow him, but remember we might be walking right into a trap here"
[23:02] <GameCrazed> "That's why your going first"
[23:02] <tavolk> "It's cool. He's shiny, and so is his friend!"
[23:04] <Furious> I exit the bar, ready to unsheathe my fullblades at the slightest hint of trouble
[23:05] <Codex> "We're so fucked."
[23:05] <tavolk> I leave after him
[23:05] <Codex> I stand and follow Furious with a bit of a distance.
[23:05] <GameCrazed> I cease dancing and follow the group.
[23:06] <Spirit> You see the warforged waiting in the alley. The glitter's worn off now, and you can clearly see the adamantine plating covering his body. A slip here would be fatal - only a narrow walkway exists behind this bar.
[23:07] <Furious> I turn to the rest of the group "Remember, we just want to spook him, we don't want another murder on our hands"
[23:07] <Dorian> I wander in, mozying on up to the group, and I say "Hey! What's going on?"
[23:07] <Furious> I facepalm
[23:07] <GameCrazed> "We dont?"
[23:08] <Spirit> The warforged pulls a small crystal from his pocket, and it hovers before him, emitting just enough light to see by. A few raindrops glint in the half-light, showing the onset of another Sharn rainstorm.
[23:09] <tavolk> You hear a click
[23:10] <Spirit> He turns around, raising a sword. "Oh, is it you that messaged me?"
[23:11] <Furious> I say to him "I was expecting to meet an employer here, these are my bodyguards."
[23:12] <Furious> "I was about to ask you the same question."
[23:12] <Spirit> "An employer? Not me, I'm afraid." He gives a nervous chuckle.
[23:13] <GameCrazed> I look for something with which to secure myself to the tavern
[23:14] <Codex> I look to the roof of the first flow of the tower.
[23:14] <Furious> "I just got this weird voice in my head... something about a job interview? Sounded intriguing"
[23:14] <Spirit> There are a few hooks to secure skysleds to - you could probably hold onto them, or use them to climb onto the roof, a couple yards up.
[23:15] <Spirit> "Yeah, me too. Could always use the plat, right?"
[23:15] <Dorian> "We all could."
[23:15] <GameCrazed> I get a secure hold onto the strongest looking hook.
[23:16] <Spirit> The warforged notices, and grabs another hook. "Rain's looking bad, isn't it? Not normal for this time of year."
[23:16] <Codex> I climb up onto the roof with the hooks. "Don't mind me, I like to be careful is all."
[23:17] <Furious> "Yeah, we should be careful, it could get slippy up here"
[23:17] <tavolk> *Plothole tries to look tough*
[23:18] <Spirit> You slip before even grabbing the first hook, and the warforged lunges towards you with his empty hand. He doesn't manage to grab you, and you begin to slowly float down.
[23:18] <Codex> "Well,"
[23:18] <Codex> "Fuck."
[23:18] <Dorian> "Wow, paranoia works."
[23:19] <GameCrazed> "Heh, he'll be alright"
[23:19] <Spirit> You could probably steer yourself onto a staircase a few metres down, and then walk back up.
[23:20] <Dorian> "I'll grab a sky-ship and grab him when he hits the ground."
[23:20] <Spirit> It takes a few seconds, but you land on the staircase. "By the nine hells, you're lucky."
[23:20] <Codex> "I-"
[23:21] <Codex> "I think I need to drink less."
[23:21] <GameCrazed> "That memory will stay with me for the rest of my days"
[23:21] <Furious> I sigh "So where the hell is this guy with the job..." I don't want to risk any more of my guards killing themselves.
[23:22] <Codex> I climb my way back up the stairs.
[23:22] <Spirit> "I don't know, just that's it's getting slippy up here. Wait, do I recognize you guys?"
[23:23] <Dorian> "No."
[23:23] <Spirit> "You not with the university?"
[23:24] <Furious> "Yeah, like 5 years ago. I thought this job opportunity was for 'experienced' wizards."
[23:24] <Spirit> "You just fans? Because you've got their robes on."
[23:25] <GameCrazed> "We are verry verry poor"
[23:25] <Furious> "No these? These are disguises... well I guess I shouldn't tell you too much. It is top secret work after all."
[23:25] <tavolk> "Indeed" *tries not to look rich*
[23:26] <Spirit> He laughs, then shrugs. "You with the king, maybe?"
[23:27] <Furious> "...Yeah" I pretend to look bored before turning to the rest of the group and shrugging.
[23:28] <Spirit> "Heh, I knew Orandil had it coming. Still, we'd better be off - looks like this guy isn't coming." He sheathes his sword and deactivates his crystal.
[23:30] <Furious> I look at Saral and say "Yeah that's a good point, we ought to be leaving soon too..."
[23:34] <Codex> "I'd give it a little more time." I say, about to try climb the 2 yards of wall again.
[23:34] <Spirit> You slip, and once more, are forced to endure the walk of shame back up the stairs.
[23:34] <Furious> I weep tears of shame underneath my helmet.
[23:34] <Codex> I run the walk of shame and try again.
[23:35] <Spirit> In this world, many paths are well trodden. The path of war, by conquerers around the world, for one. And for you, the walk of shame up those damnable stairs.
[23:36] <Furious> "Wait guys... that sounds like a dolphin!"
[23:36] <Codex> I take a running jump at the roof.
[23:36] <Spirit> You hear a stifled snort of laughter from the roof. The roof that seems forever out of your reach, now taunts you with unknown laughter.
[23:37] <Furious> I cast smoke ladder between the walkway and the roof
[23:37] <Furious> I climb up the ladder
[23:37] <Spirit> You manage to get a hand on the roof, then you get two feet on solid ground! Unfortunately, it's the ground of those damn stairs.
[23:38] <GameCrazed> "please. Just...Stop"
[23:38] <Codex> I stand at the bottom of the stairs, re-evaluating my life."
[23:38] <Furious> "If you wanted to get up here you should have just said so"
[23:38] <Spirit> On the roof is an empty beer garden. There are a few glasses left on a table, and a couple of benches. A couple of trees decorate the otherwise empty grass.
[23:38] <Furious> I gesture to the smoky ladder
[23:38] <Codex> "I-"
[23:38] <Codex> "I'm not sure I want to risk it."
[23:39] <Furious> "On second thoughts, don't move"
[23:39] <Furious> "You might slip and smash your head like a melon"
[23:39] <Codex> "That's my fear."
[23:39] <Furious> "Mmmm melon"
[23:39] <tavolk> With a click of my fingers I switch places with the disabled sailor
[23:39] <Codex> "Thank you."
[23:40] <GameCrazed> "I..I...Just. Wow"
[23:40] <tavolk> I climb back up to my previous position.
[23:40] <Dorian> I walk up to the Warforged, "Shall we take this discussion to the roof gardens? It's more sheltered, and there are seats."
[23:41] <Spirit> He looks hesitant, but then nods. "Yes, that's probably best. But what have we to discuss?"
[23:41] <Furious> I yell down "Perhaps we can get to the bottom of who offered us that job. I don't like being stood up"
[23:42] <Dorian> "What he said."
[23:42] <GameCrazed> "Aye"
[23:42] <Spirit> "Happens all the time in this business, don't sweat it. But yeah, we'll have a drink, then I'll get back to the party." He climbs effortlessly to the roof.
[23:43] <tavolk> "after you" I say to the sailor
[23:43] <Codex> I mutter something about the roof.
[23:44] <GameCrazed> I use the staris
[23:44] <Dorian> I cast Jump and launch myself up to the roof.
[23:44] <tavolk> I climb up with my spiderclimb still active
[23:45] <Spirit> You head inside, use the stairs, and walk outside again. You're a strong independant wizard who don't need no ladder.
[23:45] <tavolk> *hangs head in shame* *listens to the voice in his head* "okay"
[23:46] <Spirit> "So, what brings you guys to Sharn, anyway. Or, who?"
[23:46] <GameCrazed> Fearing the luaghter from earlier I stand in the approximate middle of the roof and cast invisibility purge.
[23:46] <Dorian> "Nothing much, just looking for work."
[23:47] <Furious> "Yeah, I was hoping to find some interesting clien-" I sigh "It's so hard to find non-retarded guards these days."
[23:48] <Dorian> "Hey, we're smart some of the time."
[23:49] <Spirit> You think you glimpse something sat in one of the trees.
[23:49] <Codex> "I've climbed hundreds of things."
[23:50] <Codex> "I helped my dad with the air ship lots of times."
[23:50] <Codex> "But for some reason."
[23:50] <Codex> "Some fucked up reason."
[23:50] <Furious> "I guess." I turn to Hohenheim. "This one though, he's randomly casting spells all the time these days. I think he's begining to lose a few screws."
[23:50] <Codex> "I can't climb a fucking two yard roof with the aid of a hook and a featherfall spell."
[23:50] <Spirit> "'Course you have." He winks. "Work? You'll find plenty here, if you don't mind almost-certain, repeated, and painful death."
[23:50] <Dorian> "Hold on, I'm going to go get a drink." I then turn to go inside.
[23:50] <GameCrazed> "I'm a wizard. And your a rabbit....Where are my pants?"
[23:52] <Furious> I yell to Saral "Grab me one while you're there, and one for our good friend here"
[23:52] <Spirit> At the completion of your spell, a bolt of lightning strikes the tree. A halfling combat rolls out of it, landing with a crossbow pointed to your back as you close the door. The warforged draws his sword.
[23:54] <Furious> "Okay guys, well played. You passed the second test."
[23:54] <tavolk> "Indeed" *hides his confusion by clapping*
[23:54] <GameCrazed> "Now if we could all begin to act serious and NOT belittle each others abilities 'sordsman' we could make some progre...dammit"
[23:56] <Spirit> The halfling shrugs. "Missed anyway. Aren't I lucky?". She sits under the tree, putting her bow on the floor. After a while, the warforged lowers his blade.
[23:56] <GameCrazed> "Now isnt this nice" I say as i sit down.
[23:57] <tavolk> "Yeah. Just peachy"
[23:57] <Spirit> The warforged, now with a less happy tone, replies "Do that again, and you die."
[23:57] <GameCrazed> "Water anyone" I say as i conjure ice glasses from the rain and allow them to fill with rainwater"
[23:57] <Codex> I also sit, trying to sooth a migrain.
[23:58] <Spirit> The halfling shakes her head and swigs from a hip flask. The warforged simply refuses.
[23:58] <Furious> "Hey, like I said. It's hard to find good guards these days. Casting spells left right and centre."
[23:59] <Furious> "To be honest it's getting hard to control them. Speaking of which, how would you guys like some work?"
[23:59] <Spirit> "I'll admit, I hadn't accounted for that. Your work?" The halfling, noticing your sailor, winks at them and gestures him over.
[00:00] <GameCrazed> "You sir. just talked yourself out of a glass of water"
[00:01] <Furious> "Well let's put it like this. These guys are going crazy. You guys aren't going crazy. Perhaps there could be a little... role reversal?"
[00:01] <Spirit> "Simple bodyguard duty?"
[00:02] <Furious> "The simplest. The best coin around too."
[00:02] <Dorian> I reemerge with drinks for everyone, "Drink all around!"
[00:02] <GameCrazed> "I'm fine, thanks for the offer".
[00:03] <Furious> "The only catch" I say as I catch a glass "Is that you must beat them in combat"
[00:03] <Spirit> "I somehow doubt that. No thank you, drinks go right through me" he replies, with a slight laugh. The halfling shakes her head, unstringing her crossbow.
[00:03] <Spirit> "A duel? Go on, more details. To the death, first blood, what?"
[00:03] <Furious> "To the death."
[00:04] <Furious> "Right here right now if you wanted."
[00:04] <Spirit> "One on one?"
[00:04] <Dorian> "You'd think we'd do it otherwise?"
[00:04] <GameCrazed> "Are you sure? wouldnt first one unconscious be better?"
[00:05] <Furious> "Of course." I turn to the group and wink
[00:05] <Furious> "One on one is the only way to decide who's truely the strongest."
[00:06] <Dorian> "Dibs on fighting the automaton."
[00:06] <Spirit> "In two days, ask again. There is a large prize tomorrow, and should we win that, our group intends on leaving for Xen'drik."
[00:07] <Dorian> "Really? Xen'drik?"
[00:07] <Spirit> "Indeed. We've heard of treasures there."
[00:07] <Furious> "I'm sorry, the job will have likely been taken by then."
[00:07] <Furious> "It's now or never."
[00:08] <GameCrazed> I begin drinking befor ethe ice glasses melt.
[00:08] <Furious> I take a sip from my drink
[00:08] <Spirit> "Then I'm afraid I must decline. If only as I'm not the speaker for our group."
[00:09] <GameCrazed> "Is he/she nearby?"
[00:09] <Dorian> "That seems fair, does that seem fair to you, Luo?" I say, turning to Luo for the last part.
[00:09] <Spirit> "Probably not. Last I heard, he was fixing his weapon up at base."
[00:09] <GameCrazed> "Tis a shame"
[00:10] <Furious> I turn to Saral. "It does. It is a shame however, I had hoped to deal with this the easy way, oh well."
[00:11] <Furious> I cast Wreath of Flames and draw my swords
[00:16] <GameCrazed> I charge the halfling, ounching her in the face with bestow curse.
[00:17] <Spirit> Your curse misses, and she gives a girlish laugh.
[00:19] <Spirit> She reponds by pointing behind you, shouting "shit! Helldrake!". When you turn, she shanks you in the kidney.
[00:22] <Spirit> With one smooth action, the warforged swings his sword at you, firing a blast of energy from his empty hand. The sword misses, but the same cannot be said for a large amount of fire.
[00:29] <Dorian> I summon up some eldritch force and focus it into a set of missiles, one at the Halfling and two at the Warforged.
[00:30] <Spirit> You hear a small shattering noise from the halfling, and a few shards of glass fall to the floor. The warforged looks less happy as two bolts smack him in the chest.
[00:32] <Codex> I charge at our melee wizard friend and attempt to rugby tackle him off of the edge, hopefully to safety.
[00:34] <Spirit> The stairs of shame beckon you once more, as you carry your magical cargo.
[00:35] <Spirit> However, your halfling overcomes her crush for long enough to stab your kidneys as well.
[00:36] <Codex> I shout up, "I love the girls who love to hate!"
[00:36] <Codex> On my way down.
[00:37] <Spirit> As a wave of weak negative energy and the rot of undeath emanates from the attempted curser, the warforged shudders in fear of a man falling off a roof.
[00:37] <Furious> I run towards the pair and cleave my blades through them.
[00:56] <Spirit> The halfling ducks with another laugh, while the warforged parries with his sword.
[02:00] <Spirit> You fire a shadowy ball of electricity at the pair, but it serves only to further torture the already-electrocuted tree.
[02:00] <tavolk> "fuck" I say simply as I step over te edge and slowly float away.
[02:02] <GameCrazed> Mid fall I begin the healing process via the aid of a mighty spell.
[02:04] <Spirit> The halfling, who's height serves neatly to put her at castration level, points the crossbow at the rest of you. "The rest of you, jump, or I pull the trigger." The warforged points his left hand at the group, raising his sword again.
[02:06] <Dorian> I smile. "Thank you, ladies and gentlemen. I hope you've had a pleasent evening, and I hope to see you again soon." I step backwards off the edge of the inn and, mid-fall, cast Fly.
[02:09] <Furious> I laugh nervously "Heh, I told you they were retarded"
[02:09] <Furious> "Congratulations... you passed test 3?"
[02:10] <Spirit> "Get off this roof." She says, without a smile.
[02:11] <Furious> I sheathe my swords before doing an elaborate pirouette off the roof
[02:11] <Spirit> As you fall, the halfling drinks deep of her flagon, before giggling and falling to the ground.
[02:14] <Dorian> I smile, fly around, and grab each one of my 'friends', before draging them along back towards the university. Leaving a glimmering rainbow "Fuck you" drawn in the sky with surprisingly good calligraphy.
[02:15] <tavolk> "Man I love drooling rainbows"
[02:17] <Spirit> Answered only with a single crossbow bolt, that thankfully missed, you land safely back at the university. "Happily" and "Victoriously", not so much.
[02:17] <Dorian> "We got mad skills yo."
[02:17] <GameCrazed> "My everything hurts"
[02:18] <GameCrazed> "That was the most disasterous encounter I have ever had the misfortune of having"
[02:18] <Codex> At least we know we're incompetent.
[02:20] <Furious> My left eye twitches slightly before I suffer a mild aneurysm.
[02:21] <GameCrazed> "We may have fucked up spectacularly but at least your english improved swordsman"
[02:22] <GameCrazed> "I need to rest my kidneys, night" I say as I make my way to bed.
[02:23] <Furious> "Oh the broken english? It was just for show. I thought it might make things more interesting."
[02:23] <Furious> "In reality it just made things a whole lot more confusing"
[02:23] <Spirit> You manage to sneak back onto university grounds, and actually get inside your dorms before collapsing to the floor in a crumpled heap.
[02:23] <Codex> "I hope I discover I can stop my kidney bleeding through the night."
[02:24] <GameCrazed> sigh, here. I put my hand on his head and cure the more serious of his wounds

-<><>_<><>-

[22:17] <Dorian> Looking for the dorms for the Dread Ball team
[22:18] <Spirit> There's the Manufactory in the middle of the district, they're probably there.
[22:18] <Dorian> And I'm off!
[22:18] <Dorian> Not in a straight line, I'm going around all the backstreets, looking aimless
[22:20] <Spirit> Okay, you see a few homeless warforged in a powered-down state, but nothing much else for a while.
[22:21] <Dorian> Good to know
[22:26] <Dorian> Am I there yet?
[22:27] <Spirit> I'd say so. Sorry, I'm shite at managing two groups.
[22:27] <Dorian> No worries
[22:27] <Dorian> Casting Invisibility and Fly and getting in through the however that lets me get in.
[22:27] <Dorian> Probably through the everything
[22:27] <Spirit> You see a large iron fence encircling the manufactory compound. The gates are guarded by several warforged, and the fence itself has towers at semi-regular intervals. A crystal is atop each tower, firing a beam at a central crystal, high in the towers.
[22:28] <Dorian> A'ight, looking for the rooms of the team we're up against?
[22:29] <Spirit> From outside, you can't really see a way to determine to function of each room. However, one room seems to be lighting up regularly, so it's probably the labs.
[22:29] <Dorian> Going there, then
[22:29] <Dorian> WIZARD, AWAAAAAAAAAAY!
[22:31] <Spirit> As you move in to land, the beam closest to your flight path turns red for a moment. However, nothing else seems to happen, and you land safely on the roof of the labs.
[22:32] <Dorian> DETECT MAGIC
[22:32] <Dorian> OH GOD DETECT MAGIC
[22:32] <Spirit> There is a single chimney, emitting multicoloured smoke. However, there are several windows, a couple of them open. The smell is alchemical, to say the least.
[22:32] <Spirit> A rough description of your mind's eye would be "MY GOD, IT'S FULL OF STARS".
[22:35] <Dorian> TO THE WINDOOOOOOOOOOOOW
[22:35] <Dorian> TO THE WALL!
[22:36] <Dorian> Yeah, flying up to the wall
[22:36] <Dorian> Next to the window
[22:37] <Spirit> Through the window, you see a human wearing goggles while working on a crossbow. You remember him from the tavern. However, see sense a fairly strong aura of divination on the goggles. He's currently looking away, hammering a bit of metal into shape.
[22:38] <Dorian> Out of the way of the window tiem is nao]
[22:39] <Dorian> Then Suggestion: "I suggest that, being the kind soul that you are, you make your team some strengthening brews and your opposition some not-so-strengthening brews. More along the lins of poison for them."
[22:40] <Spirit> You don't hear a change in his actions - just the sounds of forging, mixed with the sounds of enchanting, and footsteps. He doesn't seem alarmed, thankfully.
[22:42] <Dorian> Damn it. Alright, time to step it up a notch - CHARM MONSTER
[22:43] <Spirit> The sounds of movement stop for a moment, and you feel your spell breach his defences.
[22:45] <Dorian> Message: "Hello, friend. Do me a favour and make your friends some strengthening brews. For the game. And your enemies, they need some poisoning, yes?"
[22:48] <Spirit> The man shrugs, and puts down his crossbow before turning to several alchemical valves.
[22:49] <Dorian> Minor Image: Swapping the things around
[22:49] <Dorian> So he puts the strengthening brew in the vials for his enemies and the poison in the vials for his team
[22:50] <Spirit> He looks puzzled, and mutters "sure the nightshade was on the left..." before continuing to mix the potions.
[22:53] <Dorian> Waiting 'till he's done, then buggering off.
[22:53] <Dorian> Can and will recast fly if necessary
[22:53] <Dorian> Also Invisibility
[22:54] <Dorian> Will then return to the bar
[22:54] <Dorian> Winding through the side roads, of course

_________________


"Problems? Problems!? There is no problem I can't solve with this!"
- Mad Chainsaw Johnson

"Violence. If it's not solving all of your problems, then you simply aren't using enough of it."
- Unknown

(A)bort, (R)etry, (B)lame a Tinker Gnome?

"Dude, I've got a list of people who are going to survive. It's not into double digits."
- Me, of all people
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DorianCreed
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Re: WIZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!11!!!!!!!!!!!!!!one!!!11!oneone!!1eleven

Post by DorianCreed on Sun Apr 07, 2013 12:30 am

[CUT FOR SPACE, PLEASE MOVE ALONG]


Last edited by DorianCreed on Sun Apr 07, 2013 1:38 pm; edited 1 time in total

_________________


"Problems? Problems!? There is no problem I can't solve with this!"
- Mad Chainsaw Johnson

"Violence. If it's not solving all of your problems, then you simply aren't using enough of it."
- Unknown

(A)bort, (R)etry, (B)lame a Tinker Gnome?

"Dude, I've got a list of people who are going to survive. It's not into double digits."
- Me, of all people
avatar
DorianCreed
Legatus Legionis
Legatus Legionis

Posts : 701
Join date : 2010-11-14
Age : 22
Location : The deepest depths of the Munchkin zone.

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Re: WIZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!11!!!!!!!!!!!!!!one!!!11!oneone!!1eleven

Post by Spiritcurse on Sun Apr 07, 2013 12:30 am

[22:05] <Spiritcurse> You awaken, after one of the largest cock-ups ever to be seen in a diplomatic encounter. One of the beds in the dorm is much less vacant than it was when you went to sleep. Don't worry about it.
[22:07] <Spiritcurse> You've got a quest to fulfill in about an hour. It's got a fancy underlining and caligraphy in your quest log, so it's probably quite important, you feel.
[22:08] <GameCrazed> As I awaken I perform my regular morning rituals before reading the quest.
[22:09] <Furious> I meditate in the middle of the room for twice as long as is required, purely for effect.
[22:09] <Codex> "So, we've got a fight to the death to do. Shall we get on that?" I say outloud, performing my ritual to summon some bolts for the day.
[22:10] <Spiritcurse> Your spells settle into the familiar place in your mind. Just above the left eye. They're comfy there, chilling and poking fun at your superego.
[22:10] <Spiritcurse> Crossbow bolts appear, with a quiet da da da DAAA.
[22:10] <Dark> Slowly rising and patting its head with stubby paws, the Bear looks around with plastic eyes
[22:10] <Dorian> I stand up and head to the bathroom, as I needs to sort out my nails.
[22:11] <GameCrazed> "Is everyone ready for today's battle?"
[22:11] <Spiritcurse> Your heterosexuality gauge decreases some, but you enter the bathroom unimpeded.
[22:12] <Codex> "I have a pretty cool plan for today."
[22:13] <Codex> I look over to my Air Elemental. "I still need a name for you."
[22:14] <Spiritcurse> It spins in a rather happy circle.
[22:14] <Codex> "Do you have a name, or a voice?"
[22:14] <Dark> The bear watches it, trying to decide if it should try and set something on fire
[22:15] <GameCrazed> "A pleasure to meet you newcomer, for the sakes of courtesy my name is Van Hohenheim, and yours?"
[22:15] <Spiritcurse> It makes a sound like a short gust of wind. Sir Helpful Von AsAids would be an appropiate name.
[22:17] <Codex> "Helpful, that's what I'll call you."
[22:18] <Dergimil> Groans as the sunlight hit his eyes, waking to face one smashed bed and another one torched, his eyes rotate to the human iritatedly and murmers with his first words of the day "Do you need something?" He is glaring mostly at the sun in his eyes, but a portion of that was directed at Van.
[22:19] <GameCrazed> "We have a busy day of death and destruction and I would like to know our newest comrads name before we meet our end".
[22:19] <Furious> "Anyone know where we're supposed to go?"
[22:19] <Spiritcurse> According to your quest journal, it was back to the Kobold's Klaw.
[22:19] <Codex> "To that Kobold place,"
[22:20] <Codex> "We're meant to fight for that trophy thing again."
[22:20] <Codex> "And hopefully, not die."
[22:20] <Furious> "Ok, just don't try to climb on anything."
[22:20] <Dorian> "Goddamn, more fighting for things?" I sigh, as I exit the bathroom
[22:20] <Codex> I look over to the newcomer. "It's compulsary, by the way."
[22:20] <Dark> The bear steps away from the thing it had been climbing
[22:21] <Codex> "If you win, you don't get shouted out. If you get shouted at, you usually die."
[22:22] <Furious> I exit the room and look back at the others. "Well, let's get this over with."
[22:22] <Dergimil> Let's out a small yawn, which he covers with his right fist, he then scoffs and replies "That would imply I was to meet such an unfitting end" He then stretches and yawns once more, standing tall from his bed he moves over to his personal chest, rummaging through the contents to pick up his attire for the day.
[22:23] <GameCrazed> "Well newcomer, I'd hurry up if i were you. the last thing you want in this place is to be shouted at" I say as i follow the swordsman out of the door.
[22:25] <Dergimil> His ears twitch at the sound of the human leaving, he pulls his weapon sheath across his belt and allows it to fall to his side, and fastens it in place, as he has no clue what had previously happened, and was curious, he followed a few steps behind the group to their destination.
[22:25] <Codex> "Aye, let's go. It's at the Kobold's Klaw, don't worry, our enemies are fewer in number than us, if our scouting was right."
[22:27] <Spiritcurse> The kobold's klaw is exactly where you remember - across a thin rope bridge, past a few taverns, and right at the alchemist's. Inside, you hear the sounds of festivities - it sounds like there are a lot of people watching this match.
[22:29] <Codex> "Let's get this over with." I say, opening the door.
[22:29] <Dark> The bear woddles alongside, ready
[22:29] <Spiritcurse> The door is conveniently opened for you, by the flying body of a drunken orc. He stands up, bellows his approval, and leaps back into the barely controlled chaos.
[22:30] <Codex> "I never asked for this." I mumble, attempting to push myself inside
[22:31] <Dark> The bear hides behind the nearest persons leg
[22:31] <Furious> I follow, preparing my anus for the devisation which is about to follow
[22:31] <Spiritcurse> There appears to be some pre-game entertainment - two warforged are on a stage, playing a strange form of music. A large crowd gathers, but the Cannith Crushers are sat at a table in a darkened corner. The halfling beckons you over.
[22:32] <Dorian> I adjust my clothes and head over to the table.
[22:32] <Dorian> "How are you today?"
[22:33] <Spiritcurse> "Pretty good, you? Ready for the competition?" A massive warforged, emblazoned with the Cannith symbol, pulls several chairs out for you.
[22:33] <Spiritcurse> By which I mean, out of his chest. Why he stores furniture there is a question for another time.
[22:33] <Dark> The bear walks up to the leg of the table and with remarkable skill climbs up to sit on the edge with its stubby legs swinging
[22:33] <Dorian> "We are, yes. In both respects."
[22:34] <Dorian> I smile, thank him, and take a seat.
[22:34] <Furious> I walk over, wipe the oil off one of the chairs, before sitting down on it.
[22:34] <GameCrazed> I adopt to stand behind one of my comerads chairs
[22:34] <Dergimil> Pulls one from the group back underneath the shroud of the chaos, he whispers to them that he is going to see about purchasing some items, and walks off without waiting for whoever's retort.
[22:34] <Spiritcurse> The warforged nods, before kneeling by the side of the table and drinking deep from a flagon.
[22:35] <Spiritcurse> A human, this one with a large mark of making on their face, takes the closest seat to you. "So, can I offer you a drink?"
[22:36] <Codex> "I'll go for one."
[22:36] <Dark> The bear holds up a paw
[22:36] <Dorian> I take one, "Go on then."
[22:37] <Spiritcurse> He takes out a hip flask and pours several glasses for you, pushing it to your end of the table.
[22:37] <GameCrazed> "why not, I say taking the cup".
[22:37] <Furious> I grab a drink and down it instantly. "Why thank you."
[22:38] <Dorian> I place a hand over the cup and mutter a few words, attempting to divine any poison in it.
[22:38] <Dark> The bear takes a bit of it on its paw and simply begins dabbing at where its smiling mouth is sown onto its face
[22:39] <GameCrazed> Watching my companions drink I quickly down the glass.
[22:39] <Spiritcurse> It tastes delicious and refreshing, and those of you accustomed to wine sense a hint of the Talenta plains in the brew.
[22:39] <Dorian> I drink my drink as well, "Sorry for the paranoia, it's a thing amongst my people."
[22:39] <Furious> I slam the flagon onto the table and let out a huge belch.
[22:40] <Spiritcurse> "Happens a lot, don't worry. Truth be told, we'd do the same to you." The halfling chuckles, caressing her crossbow. She cocks an eyebrow at the elemental.
[22:40] <Codex> I drink deeply. Afterwards, I say to the human: "Thanks for that."
[22:40] <Codex> "Oh, I forgot about you,"
[22:40] <Codex> "This is helpful. Say hello!"
[22:41] <Spiritcurse> The elemental whirls slightly.
[22:42] <Dark> The bear waves at it as its other hand gets another bit of drink
[22:45] <Codex> I exhale as I put the cup down. "I've not drank any wine for a while, thank you."
[22:45] <Spiritcurse> "My pleasure. Ali knows a guy who knows a guy who specialises in acquiring wine." The halfling gives a little giggle, and drinks from her own flask.
[22:47] <Codex> I rub my side. "You know, you really did a number on me yesterday." I wink at the halfling.
[22:47] <Dark> The bear seems to laugh at something
[22:48] <Spiritcurse> "Hey, what's a kidney between friends? Tell you what, if you last through the game, Mikal'll fix it up. Give you a new one if you want."
[22:48] <Codex> "Sounds good to me, good luck today by the way. We had a mighty misunderstanding yesterday."
[22:49] <Spiritcurse> "It's only fair. I was going to assassinate at least one of you guys anyway."
[22:49] <GameCrazed> "I will rain down a world of hurt that no number of gods can save your from. As the world you used to know collapses around you I will remind you of the ways you have wronged me and you will rue that day"
[22:50] <Codex> "He's a sore loser, ignore him."
[22:50] <GameCrazed> My face sufddenly brightens and I smile "Meh, what do I care, that's far too much effort".
[22:50] <Spiritcurse> The human laughs. "Damn right. Besides, it's only a game. A rather deadly one, that is. You guys know how this round works?"
[22:51] <Dorian> "Same as the last one?"
[22:51] <Spiritcurse> "Nah, simpler this time. Ball's in the middle, you gotta get it through our goal. And vice versa. First to three wins, or last team with a man standing."
[22:52] <Codex> "Seems fair enough."
[22:56] <Codex> "Do you know what time we're due to start?"
[22:57] <Spiritcurse> "Not too long from now." Right on cue, two kobolds enter the bar and hold up a sign each. One says 'Cannith Crushers', the other 'Dem Wizzad Guys'.
[22:58] <Furious> I stand up and quickly do some stretches.
[22:58] <Codex> "Titties and Kitties. We have a sub now by the way." I gesture to our new guy.
[22:59] <Dark> The bear seems to have fallen asleep with the glass (giant when compared to it) still wrapped in its paw
[23:00] <Spiritcurse> The Cannith team stand and walk up to the kobolds. Ali gives a wink before she leaves, and the rest wish you luck.
[23:00] <Codex> I prod the bear. "Hey, that poison was nothing, walk it off." I call after the other team: "See ya' soon."
[23:01] <Dark> The bear simply drops the glass as it rises and climbs onto your arm without asking permission, sitting on your shoulder in silence
[23:03] <Furious> I walk over to the kobold holding our sign. "Alright, where are we going?"
[23:03] <Codex> "Follow the Kobold, it'll be fine."
[23:03] <Dorian> I stand up, stretch off, and head over to the 'Bolds. "We good to go?"
[23:04] <Spiritcurse> "Inna hol, play bal gam. Is fun, yark?" He wanders out of the bar, expecting you to follow him.
[23:04] <Furious> I flex my sexy body as I finish readying my maneuvers.
[23:04] <Furious> I abruptly stop and follow the kobold.
[23:04] <GameCrazed> I follow the kobold
[23:05] <Dorian> I follow the 'Bold expectantly, my spells at the ready.
[23:06] <Spiritcurse> He walks for a few minutes, stopping before a large hole, several yards in the ground. It's about a hundred yards square, with a rough goal on each end. There is a large sign stuck in the ground, saying "Der areenur".
[23:07] <Codex> "I love it."
[23:07] <Dorian> "As do I."
[23:07] <GameCrazed> "Did I ever mention how much I hate sport?"
[23:08] <Codex> "As long as you don't try to punch them, I'm sure you'll be fine."
[23:08] <GameCrazed> "Oh goodness that was terrible. Fortunately this is one of the few occasions I find myself encouraged to play"
[23:08] <Codex> Assuming we're far enough away to not be overheard, I begin to explain a plan of mine.
[23:08] <Codex> "Here's what I think we should do."
[23:09] <Furious> I listen intently.
[23:09] <Codex> "Helpful will obscure their vision for a short time whilst we try and get the ball."
[23:09] <Spiritcurse> The kobold says "Wen yu's redy, get inna hol. Gaym sun." He scampers away, into a watchtower looking over the arena.
[23:09] <Codex> "Once we have the ball, I'll recall them and bind him to the ball, so that he can force it to avoid our goal."
[23:09] <Codex> I turn to Helpful. "You got that?"
[23:10] <Spiritcurse> He spins in a small circle.
[23:11] <Codex> "Great."
[23:11] <Codex> "Any other plans we can do, while we're at it?"
[23:12] <Furious> "Since I'm the most survivable, I suggest you guys focus on helping me get the ball and run with it to the enemy goal. Talking about speed and resistance spells here."
[23:13] <Dorian> "We set them on fire until they're dead."
[23:13] <Furious> "That too."
[23:14] <Codex> "I'd rather avoid too many deaths to be honest,"
[23:14] <Codex> "I mean, That halfling has the hots for me."
[23:14] <Dorian> "Then we'll set them on fire until they're unconcious."
[23:15] <GameCrazed> "I have a nice little lineup that should be useful".
[23:15] <Codex> "That's better."
[23:15] <Dergimil> Returns to the previous location of the party, now lavished in equipment and goods, he searches around silently for the group, does he find anyone?
[23:16] <Spiritcurse> You find the rest of the party, stood next to a hole.
[23:16] <Furious> "Right, no time like the present." I jump into the pit
[23:17] <GameCrazed> I prepare some last minute spells before following him into the hole.
[23:17] <Dergimil> Leaves out the backside of the building, he assumes is an inn, and walks forward onto a field to find his group standing around a hole, curiosity brought him towards them and to ask what the hole was about.
[23:17] <Codex> "Hey, nice of you to join us. The plan is to get the ball and enchant it, then enchant our front runner here." I point to the Swordsman.
[23:17] <Codex> "Other than that, break bones, try not to break brains too hard."
[23:18] <Spiritcurse> The Cannith team meet you, six of them arrayed about their half of the 'pitch'. The warforged stands in a small circle in the middle, while the rest are scattered. The halfling is in the back left side, and a bulky half-orc is stood in goal.
[23:18] <Dergimil> "Cheating, clobbering, with a chance of potential death? I like it, I'm in." He says with a smile.
[23:19] <Furious> I approach the centre circle, and hold my hand out for the warforged to shake.
[23:20] <Spiritcurse> He shakes your hand, before withdrawing a large staff from his chest cavity.
[23:24] <Furious> I look around at the rest of the group and wonder what they are doing
[23:25] <Spiritcurse> The kobold bellows from his watchtower. "Gud peepul of der citee of Sharn, welcum to der areenur! Todai, der be too teems! Der Canif crushurs, an der Titys an Kitys!"
[23:26] <Furious> "Ok guys, get down here and spread out."
[23:27] <Spiritcurse> "Teems, is yu redy?", the kobold bellows again.
[23:28] <Dorian> I walk towards the far left and take a combat pose.
[23:29] <Spiritcurse> The Cannith team cast various defensive spells, and take up a fighting stance. The warforged bellows "READY".
[23:29] <Codex> "Ready."
[23:30] <Dergimil> Unsheathing my newly purchased raiper, I swiftly pull it from it's sheath, swinging in in an X motion infront of me and finally holding it pointed towards the enemy, I nod towards my teammates, signifying my readiness.
[23:30] <Codex> I put a hand on the Swordsman's shoulder, Channeling a strengthening enhancement.
[23:30] <Spiritcurse> "Lots! Too! Wun! Let der gayms... begin!"
[23:35] <GameCrazed> I put my hand on the swordmans forehead and the instanty after the words were spoken he dissapears from sight.
[23:36] <Codex> "Haha, oh wow."
[23:36] <Spiritcurse> The halfling reaches into her pouch, withdrawing several marbles. She throws them around her team's goal, then puts on a pair of goggles.
[23:38] <Furious> I chuckle at the fact that I have just become invisible, before leaping towards the ball and attempting to pick it up.
[23:38] <Spiritcurse> The warforged swings towards you, but misses. Mostly due to not being able to see you.
[23:40] <Furious> Having picked up the ball, I move towards the enemy goal, avoiding enemies.
[23:41] <Spiritcurse> The cleric raises their hammer, creating a rune in the air. They strike it, and a deafening ring chimes out across the field. A circle of silver appears around their goal.
[23:42] <Furious> I quickly hide the ball in my hat.
[23:42] <Spiritcurse> The artificer fires a volley of crossbow bolts at your invisible warrior. Two bolts strike home, then fade from normal sight.
[23:45] <Codex> Helpful swirls and dives into the centre of the enemy group and ups his spinning by a lot. He becomes a Whirlwind, attempting to obscure the vision of the enemy team.
[23:46] <Dergimil> Scans the area before him, what does he see?
[23:46] <Spiritcurse> You hear muffled cursing from the team, especially a halfling.
[23:47] <Spiritcurse> You see approximately fuck all, considering the elemental encompasses most of the pitch.
[23:50] <Dergimil> Brings his gloved hand infront of him, murmering words of power he casts a Displacement spell on himself, to the enemies, he will be two feet away from his true location.
[23:52] <Dergimil> Digs his heels into the dirt beneath him, his raiper still pointed towards the enemy, though it was now pointed towards the swirling cloud, he does not move.
[23:52] <Spiritcurse> The bard runs out of the whirlwind, playing the song of his people on his guitar and cursing at you.
[23:54] <Spiritcurse> The whirlwind lauches a stone at him as he runs, catching him on the back of the head. He shouts.
[23:59] <Dorian> I fuse two spells together and throw them at Luo.
[23:59] <Dorian> The spells in question happen to be Expeditious Retreat and Celerity.
[00:01] <Furious> When the spells hit me, I leap even closer to the goal.
[00:03] <Spiritcurse> The dwarf hefts his axe and runs to your side of the field, taking a swing at the source of the spell fusion.
[00:08] <Codex> I throw an infusion at the warforged which causes him to begin to rust and causes screws to fall out. He isn't a happy Warforged.
[00:13] <Codex> I do however, find myself within 5ft of the unhappy metal man.
[00:14] <Spiritcurse> The warforged opens his chest, revealing absolute horror. It claws at your mind, and you collapse to the floor with a scream. However, you still breath.
[00:16] <Dark> Tilting its head, the bear suddenly convulges and, without a sound and out of fecking nowhere...there is a giant ass bear standing with you
[00:24] <Dark> Letting out a deafening roar, the bear lunges at the drawf with its claws slashing out towards his face
[00:30] <GameCrazed> Focusing my power into my spectral hand i send it careering towards the dwarfs head. It lands a solid hit and delivers a devastating mixture of magic.
[00:33] <Spiritcurse> The halfling draws another bolt, and fades out of sight.
[00:38] <Dorian> Luo runs at the marbles and the circle, attempts and fails to dispel the circle, then jumps the marbles and circle and attempts to dunk the ball into the goal.
[00:42] <Spiritcurse> You feel a warm feeling run down your spine, as you slam the ball down. The Silver Flame smiles down on you, and even the sphere of force below you parts for your dunk. It shatters the effect, launching shards of the astral construct across the field. "SCORE!" bellows a kobold.
[00:44] *** Maruu quit (Quit: HydraIRC -> http://www.hydrairc.com <- The alternative IRC client)
[00:45] <Spiritcurse> The ball reappears in the middle of the field, and the cleric dives onto it. The artificer shouts a few words, and your elemental retains its fucks for a later date.
[00:50] <Codex> Helpful dives towards the Warforged, angered at the fact that he has greviously harmed his master. He postions himself atop the warforged and extends his height to his maximum.
[00:52] <Codex> The elemental buffets the Warforged as hard as he can, for a small amount of damage. He's still mad though.
[00:56] <Dergimil> Glares towards the bard, he rushes and lunges his raiper into the bard who previously insulted him.
[01:00] <Spiritcurse> The bard yelps in agony, and stops playing.
[01:00] <Spiritcurse> He draws an axe, but his attack misses by several feet.
[01:02] <Dergimil> After stabbing the bard twice in his gut, and dodging the bard's strike, he lays into him with another lunge into his gut, his raiper entering significently.
[01:07] <Dorian> I turn to the Dwarf, turn him into a frog, then pulp the frog with a burst of sound.
[01:08] <Codex> I sit up very straight, very suddenly and take an extremely deep breath.
[01:08] <Dark> The large bear frowns at this
[01:11] <Codex> I curl up into a ball and create a slightly shimmering globe around myself, about 10ft in diameter. I then draw my crossbow.
[01:13] <Spiritcurse> The warforged pulls a large greataxe from his chest, picks up the cleric, and begins to run directly towards your goal.
[01:18] <Dark> With a lunge the bear strikes at the struggling Warforge
[01:22] <GameCrazed> Once again I send my spectral hand careering towards the healer. it then immendately tranforms his blood into fire and acid.
[01:23] <Spiritcurse> The halfling shimmers into visibility directly behind you, grinning a shit eating grin and pulling the trigger on her crossbow. A bolt hits you right in the neck.
[01:25] <Furious> I run towards the bard and slash him with both my fullblades
[01:28] <Furious> I chop through the poor bard's weak neck and laugh very loudly as I watch his head roll along the floor. I pick up his head and slam it on the floor.
[01:29] <Spiritcurse> The kobolds cheer, and the crowd goes wild. One kobold bellows "Dat be alf tiym! Yays! Go cleen up, mur gaym sun!"
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Spiritcurse
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Re: WIZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!11!!!!!!!!!!!!!!one!!!11!oneone!!1eleven

Post by Spiritcurse on Sun Apr 21, 2013 12:18 am

[22:26] <Spiritcurse> The yelling voice of a kobold stirs you from what was totally an 8 hour voice. "GIT INNA HOL! PLA BAL NOA". Clearly an ordinary and good start to a session.
[22:26] <Spiritcurse> And by voice, I mean rest. Shit, I'm not even drunk yet.
[22:27] <@Dorian> "Goddamn it, time for dreadball"
[22:28] <GC> "I am a seething pit of anger and hate".
[22:28] <Codex> "It just got angsty in here."
[22:28] <Spiritcurse> Your morning angst grants you powers. The drow gods smile upon you.
[22:30] <Dark> The bear scratches at its chin as it looks up, giving on the apperance of smiling
[22:32] <Dergimil> I leave without a word because I wish to hurry us up so we can get to clobbering the other team.
[22:32] <Spiritcurse> "GIT INA HOL! NAO! MOF MOF MOF!" the kobold yells, seemingly irritated.
[22:32] <Codex> "Fine, fine."
[22:32] <Spiritcurse> You step out into the daylight, possibly pondering the philosophical ramifications - are you indeed out of the cave, or merely stood in the light of your own ignorance? But in reality, you're outside.
[22:32] <GC> "Fuck it! lets get this shit storm under way" I announce as I leave the room.
[22:32] <Spiritcurse> A hole confronts you, immobile and resolute in its being-a-hole.
[22:33] <@Dorian> I jump in the hole, in a most chaotic lolsorandumb action
[22:33] <Spiritcurse> Inside the hole are the surviving house Cannith members. The halfling winks at you.
[22:33] <Dark> For some reason the bear has missed all of this as its decided to walk backwards
[22:34] <Codex> "I told you man, I'm totally in there."
[22:34] <Furious> I enter le hole
[22:35] <Spiritcurse> The hole accepts your entry, possibly humbling you by not needing to stretch to accomodate your girth. But then, it is a dreadball pitch.
[22:36] <Spiritcurse> The kobold jumps up and down with impatience. "GET INNA FUKIN HOL RITE NAO!"
[22:37] <GC> I jump in the hole, simultaniously smoking a pipe because why not? I'm a wizard after all.
[22:37] <Dark> The bear stops at the edge of the hole, not getting in with its back still turned as if looking for somthing
[22:37] <@Dorian> I Mage Hand the bear into the hole.
[22:39] <Dark> The bear makes a slight squike as it drops in
[22:39] <Codex> "Shall we get started then?"
[22:39] <Codex> "I can't wait to die again."
[22:39] <Spiritcurse> "YEH! NOA, GUD PEEPUL OF DER IMPEARIUL CITEH, WELCUM TO DER AREENUR. LET DER GAYUMS... BE GENNING!"
[22:39] <Dergimil> I FOLLOW THE TEAM ((I dun even kno wos goin on halp))
[22:40] <Spiritcurse> A small pixie appears next to you.
[22:40] <Dark> The bear climbs onto the Kobold and its ontop of his head, holding a hand up like a cute, furry knight
[22:40] <Spiritcurse> "Hi, I'm the exposition fairy! You're playing a ball game, with your lives on the line!" It vanishes.
[22:41] <Dergimil> "....Fuck."
[22:41] <Spiritcurse> "GET DER FUK INNA HOL!", the kobold yells, throwing you at the ball.
[22:41] <GC> "I've had worse news".
[22:45] <Spiritcurse> You land on the ball, with a thump. A whistle blows, which means either the start of the game, or a passing man has a mean sense of humour, and a whistle.
[22:48] <@Dorian> I fuse several spells together, namely Expeditious Retreat and Dimension Door, and port over to the ball whilst attempting to grab it.
[22:49] <Spiritcurse> As you grab the ball, the warforged decides to stab you in the face. It hurts a little.
[22:51] <@Dorian> I then tank a five foot step away from the Warforged then dash around wide to the left of the pitch.
[22:55] <Dergimil> I look in front of me, who is the closest enemy to me?
[22:57] <Dergimil> My body starts shaking, as an illusion of my self is released from my person and shoots forward a few feet in front of me.
[22:58] <Dergimil> I then do nothing.
[23:02] <GC> I plant my feet in a sturdy position and thrust my fist into the air. the instant this action is completed, black slick tentackles erupt from the ground and begin to attemt to grapple the halfling and the goal keeper.
[23:03] <Spiritcurse> They both struggle, but your tentacles wrap around them and lift them into the air. Several onlookers wonder about your ulterior motives.
[23:06] <Codex> The elemental charges forwards at the closest person to the ball carrier and attempts to get in their way.
[23:08] <Spiritcurse> The dwarf breaks free, diving to one side and casting a spell. A shimmering field of red and blue encircles the goal.
[23:09] <Spiritcurse> The warforged fires two rays at the man with the ball. Missing twice, he curses and fires one more. It hits you solidly in the back.
[23:10] <Spiritcurse> A demonic shield erupts around you, and the ray dissipates harmlessly around you. Your illusion shimmers slightly, but no damage is dealt.
[23:11] <Spiritcurse> The halfling struggles in the grasp of the tentacles, but fails to escape.
[23:12] <Furious> I run towards the warforged and attack him
[23:22] <Spiritcurse> You hit him with a sword, I guess.
[23:23] <Furious> I swing at him with both fullblades, he gracefully dodges one but gets hit by the other one right on his pinkie finger
[23:23] <Spiritcurse> The human puts on a pair of glasses, and throws a stone into the goal with a shout of some arcane language.
[23:28] <Dark> Jumping from where it had been clinging onto the ball, the Bear suddenly becomes a real bear and lunges to...hug the warforged
[23:29] <Dark> From where the bear is gribbing it, a touch of rust begins to seep into the machines joints
[23:30] <Spiritcurse> He yells in a mix of anger and pain, with a fair amount of surprise in there too.
[23:32] <@Dorian> I again fuse two spells together, this time Dimension Door and Electric Jolt, in order to drop the ball in the goal from point blank range whilst electrocuting the goalie.
[23:33] <Codex> I apply a large number of infusions via Concurrent Infussion to various pieces of my clothes including: Indisputable Possesion, Ablative and Armour Enhancement, Lesser.
[23:37] <Spiritcurse> A blinding ball of light envelops the goal as you teleport in, burning your flesh away. You manage to avoid the majority of the explosion, however.
[23:38] <Codex> "Urgh."
[23:38] <@Dorian> "OW! That hurt!" I shout, as I place the ball in the goal.
[23:39] <Spiritcurse> The ball vanishes, and reappears in the middle of the field, next to the warforged.
[23:39] <Dergimil> "Hrmph, at least scored." he scoffs.
[23:39] <Dergimil> CASTS VERTIGO ON THE WARFORGED.
[23:39] <Dergimil> "Fall, forged beast"
[23:41] <Spiritcurse> The warforged looks down, and a brief corona of white feathers encircles him.
[23:41] <Dergimil> I rush towards the ball, with my displacement in front, I stand just behind the ball and crouch, so it looks like my displacement is trying to pick up the ball.
[23:45] <GC> I send my spectral hand straight for the halfling's face, preparing a rather unplesant curse for the defenceless creature.
[23:46] <Spiritcurse> Already somewhat busy with the tentacles, her screaming only intensifies as you touch her. The sense motive check for your ulterior motives is decreased by 5.
[23:46] <Codex> "A little unncessacery, no?"
[23:50] <Codex> The elemental flies next to Aelith displacement and prepares to attack anything that launches an attack against it
[23:51] <Spiritcurse> The dwarf raises their hammer, conjuring a rune in the air and striking it. A dull chime sounds throughout the battlefield.
[23:51] <Codex> I take some steps forwards and fire my crossbow at the Warforged.
[23:53] <Codex> I miss magnificently, critically even. Twice.
[23:53] <Codex> AGAIN.
[23:54] <Codex> "STAY STILL, DAMN IT."
[23:54] <Spiritcurse> The warforged grins a grin that only one with a metal face built for grinning can grin, and opens his chest. Inside, lies horror.
[23:57] <Spiritcurse> You drop to the floor, heart beginning to slow to a crawl. He cackles madly as you sink down.
[23:59] <Spiritcurse> The halfling writhes. It's starting to look like something by Zone.
[00:00] <Furious> I continue my assault on the warforged stanidng infront of me
[00:04] <Furious> I swing my blades wildly at the warforged, one cuts clean through his neck. His head flies off and explodes before the body falls to its knees.
[00:05] <Codex> "Seriously, fuck that guy. Well done."
[00:05] <Spiritcurse> The artificer draws a flask from his waist and flings it towards you. He then redraws a heavy crossbow.
[00:05] <Dark> The bear nudges the warforged with its nose before sniffing
[00:06] <Furious> I look in horror at my arm covered in acid as it begins to burn
[00:08] <Dark> Bellowing, the bear seems to move more like a lion then a bear as it charges towards the Artificer, its claws flashing
[00:11] <Dark> In a shower of blood and other...things....the bear royaly fucks the artificer up
[00:13] <@Dorian> I grab the goalie before dropping a third fused spell: Minor Image, to veil the goal, and Dimension Door, straight up.
[00:14] <Spiritcurse> You manage to grab the dwarf, but don't have time to cast your spell yet.
[00:21] <GC> I point at the halfling before saying in a smug voice, "it's all just a game, remember". At which point my spectral hand slaps her, dealing a noxious mixture of curse and fell frain.
[00:23] <Spiritcurse> She struggles, as much as one can while held by dark magic.
[00:23] <GC> My face darkens as I mutter "curses".
[00:26] <Spiritcurse> The dwarf wrests herself free of your grasp. Despite you clawing at her face, she still blasts you with holy magic.
[00:29] <Codex> I take another couple of shots, this time at the Dwarf.
[00:31] <Codex> The bolt contacts with the shoulder of the Dwarf reels but he is still stood, Stelwart.
[00:32] <Spiritcurse> The halfling squees somewhat, apparently less than unused to the ministrations of your tentacles. She's still stuck though.
[00:35] <@Dorian> Luo Koi-Huo charges the halfling, swinging his swords as he goes.
[00:38] <@Dorian> He then suddnely leaps out of the tentacle field
[00:44] <Dark> Turning towards Aelitf, the Bear releases a faint breath which seeps into hits wounds
[00:45] <@Dorian> I D.Door straight up all of the 800 feet of possible range. I'll be back later.
[00:47] <Dergimil> Bounds up onto his feet and scans the area around him, what enemies are closest?
[00:53] <Dergimil> I bum rush the dwarf and mildly scratch it.
[00:53] <Dergimil> Fuck that bitch.
[00:54] <GC> 1d20+6
[00:56] <GC> I point my finger at the violated, screaming halfling before hundreds of tiny scratches begin ripping through her flesh. most of which for an unknown reason appear to be focused on her face.
[00:57] <Spiritcurse> The wounds start to bleed, before opening wider and wider. After a few more screams, the tentacles release their grip, and the halfling collapses to the floor.
[00:57] <GC> My eyes darken and a smile speads across my face. I wisper to myself, "just a game...".
[00:59] <Furious> My right eye twitches, as my jaw slowly opens
[00:59] <Spiritcurse> The dwarf, hearing the screams of her allies, drops her symbol and raises her arms in the sky. The kobold blows another whistle, shouting "DAT IT! TO MUCH URTIN SO WES GOT TO SAI STAHP!"
[00:59] <Dark> The bear turns its head towards the kobold and gives a low growl
[01:00] <Furious> "Hurting? This hunk o metal didn't feel pain did it" I kick the remains of the warforged
[01:01] <@Dorian> I float down on wings of magic, "So, what's going on?"
[01:01] <GC> "did we win?"
[01:01] <Spiritcurse> The archchancellor approaches the edge of the field, and summons a ladder to help you climb out. "WELL DONE, YOUNG ONES!". A few commoners who were too close, cease to exist.
[01:01] <Codex> "We did, as gross as it was."
[01:02] <@Dorian> "Goddamn it, I wanted to burn things."
[01:02] <Codex> I approach and attempt to climb said ladder.
[01:02] <Furious> I walk over and climb the ladder
[01:03] <GC> "WONDERFUL!!!" I exclaim, "First rounds on me". I climb the ladder.
[01:03] <@Dorian> I fly out of the arena
[01:03] <Spiritcurse> "You managed to successfully abandon the only piece of coursework you've been given this year, and instead play a ball game and waste time on masochistic torture of citizens!"
[01:04] <@Dorian> "We're Wizards, we got the thing, and we won. Does this mean we get an A?"
[01:05] <Dark> The bear grunts and returns to its teddy size
[01:05] <Spiritcurse> "I suppose so! Good enough!" The wizard's beard glimmers in a rainbow pattern.
[01:05] <Codex> "Please?"
[01:05] <Codex> "YESSS."
[01:06] <Spiritcurse> "EXCELLENT!", the wizard bellows. A small explosion can be heard from the sky.
[01:06] <Codex> I say nothing in the hopes of him bellowing less.
[01:07] <Spiritcurse> "Now, somebody far less sexy than me will be educating you further! And before you say anything, yes, this counts as education!" Something small streaks down from the explosion, possibly a small meteor.
[01:07] *** Dark quit (Quit: HydraIRC -> http://www.hydrairc.com <- The professional IRC Client Very Happy)
[01:08] <GC> I pick it up.
[01:08] *** Dergimil quit (Quit: HydraIRC -> http://www.hydrairc.com <- Organize your IRC)
[01:08] <Spiritcurse> After a few more seconds, the object hits the ground. It appears to be a robotic kobold. "This thing can play too."
[01:09] <Codex> "What is this?"
[01:09] <GC> I think about my recent decision before rushing over and taking it home
[01:09] <Spiritcurse> "I's Voslen, ho der fuk ar yu?"
[01:09] <GC> "Your coming with me little guy".
[01:10] <Spiritcurse> "I's not. Gotta hows to go tu."
[01:10] <GC> "It's a wizard collage? You sure you dont want to learn magic?
[01:11] <Spiritcurse> "Gota wizud bits alredi." The kobold raises an arm, blowing a small chunk out of the wall.
[01:12] <GC> "You'd fit in marvelously, if you do come with us, avoid the fat bearded man if you value the position your rivets are currently in".
[01:12] <Spiritcurse> "Fri fudz and shinis?"
[01:13] <@Dorian> "Yes."
[01:14] <GC> "It's a wizard college, we can make a brick shit rainbows if we want to. yes there will be food and 'shinis'".
[01:14] <Spiritcurse> "Yu haz deal." The kobold extends his non-explosive claw, for a handshake.
[01:14] <GC> I grasp his hand and give it a firm shake/
[01:15] <Spiritcurse> The kobold hovers off the floor slightly and begins flying away, propelled by rocket boots.
[01:16] <GC> I cast air walk and return to the wizard college in the most relaxing way possible.
[01:17] <Spiritcurse> You feel your kobold kounter increment, then a slowing of the world around as the session ends.
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Spiritcurse
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Re: WIZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!11!!!!!!!!!!!!!!one!!!11!oneone!!1eleven

Post by DorianCreed on Sat Apr 27, 2013 11:16 pm


[22:07] <@Dorian> Last time, after copious ammounts of drinking, the rule of the universe passed from one man to his angrier, less forgiving friend. The world weeped, but at least you all passed your first year at Wizard University, despite none of you actually being Wizards. Good job there, examiners.
[22:08] <@Dorian> I jest, I jest. But seriously, winning a game of magical angryball isn't a good way to get a first on your Diploma. So, astrology classes.
[22:08] <@Dorian> Which you're in now. Deal with it.
[22:09] <Codex> I aware from my quick doze in the back of the room and look around.
[22:10] <Spirit> Taking a break from my regular activities of "trying to unscrew the crystal balls and steal them", I actually glance at the board. This lasts all of seven seconds, a new record.
[22:11] <@Dorian> The room is dark, due to the lights being out and it being night, because WATCH THE SKIES. You WOULD be likely to be eaten by a Grue, but something killed them all off. Anyway, it's a nondescript classroom, only with no roof and telescopes
[22:11] <GameCrazed> I sit there gazing into space as my spectral hand begins to enter the local brothel.
[22:12] <@Dorian> Unfortunately, the only local brothel specialises in male Kobold hookers.
[22:13] <Spirit> Thankfully off-duty, I proceed unmolested. I kid, I kid. Even so, I activate my vision augmentations and stare idly into space, wondering how to steal the very stars.
[22:13] <Furious> I sniff the air
[22:13] <Codex> I look across the papers on my desk, looking for an assignment or something to do.
[22:13] <@Dorian> The stars you can actually see are all dragon shards in a very nice halo. All glowy pink and stuff.
[22:14] <@Dorian> The only assignment you have is "Find out why the alignment of the stars."
[22:14] <@Dorian> In those exact words. Noone explained it, and I have no idea either.
[22:14] <Furious> I look at the stars and concentrate on them
[22:15] <Spirit> I consider the problem, as well as the deeper ramifications of the stars on my life, and the lives of kobold-kind. Then, with deep concentration, I write "Lorefull shini" on my sheet of paper, fold my arms, and sit back.
[22:15] <GameCrazed> After the recent unpleasant experience I decide to actuall pay attention to were I am.
[22:16] <@Dorian> The stars are not affected by your concentration, as hard as you try
[22:16] <GameCrazed> I think to myself, "Sooo, stars, lack of roof, telescopes and I cant see anything. I must be in the astrology room".
[22:18] <Furious> I try look at the alignment of the stars and try to remember anything that may be relevant from my arcana training from my grandma
[22:18] <Codex> I mull over the question for a while, thinking about the arcane and the planes. Suddenly it clicks and begin to write.
[22:19] <Furious> After thinking for a while, I realise what I have got myself into and begin writing something vaguely relevant on the paper
[22:20] <Codex> "The stars are there because. They're there because they want to be. They are Ethereal." I put down my pen and think over what I have written, making no attempt to cover my sheets.
[22:20] <Spirit> After further thought, I expand my answer. "Stars gud an rite. Teim of ertheril is nih. An also, dey shini." I then activate my messaging protocols, and telepathically send my answer to the rest of the class.
[22:20] <GameCrazed> I edge over to my closest companion to seek advice on my suspicion that the stars are made of cheese.
[22:21] <@Dorian> From looking at your friend's paper, you manage to discover that, whilst some stars ARE in fact made of cheese, most are made of fire and blood.
[22:22] <GameCrazed> I begin to write this down, along with any other ideas I come up with that seems to make sense even if there is no evidence to prove it.
[22:24] <Spirit> Having completed my assignment in the finest Common ever written by a kobold, I return to the arduous task of stealing the damn crystal ball.
[22:28] <Codex> My Fire and Air elemental slip out of my sleeves and sit on the desk, peering around in their tiny forms.
[22:28] <Furious> I slyly raise my hand and point at Penny, whispering something under my breath
[22:30] <Codex> I shake my head.
[22:32] <Codex> I whisper under my breath, back.
[22:33] <@Dorian> Some time later, after your lesson is over, you're all gathered outside the classroom because discussing the test is a age old method of making stupid people feel stupider.
[22:33] <Furious> About to start ripping my hair out, I suddenly perk up and begin writing furiously on the paper
[22:34] <Codex> "I suggest we drink ourselves stupid."
[22:34] <Codex> "After that tiresome debacle."
[22:34] <Spirit> "Yeh. Drinkin gud way to not fil stopid."
[22:34] <GameCrazed> "What a pathetic way of testing our magical prowess"
[22:36] <Codex> "How long have you been here, Kobold? In the University I mean."
[22:37] <Spirit> "Formali or on steelin bisnus?"
[22:37] <Codex> "Either or."
[22:38] <Spirit> "Bout... twenni days. Tryd tu gettoud, got shot doun."
[22:38] <Codex> "So they made you learn?"
[22:39] <Codex> "What a horrid punishment."
[22:39] <Spirit> "Dey wanna no whi is got dis wore forjud bitz."
[22:39] <Furious> I sigh and walk towards the nearest tavern
[22:40] <Codex> "Oh I see!"
[22:41] <Spirit> "Yu liek?" I activate my rocket feet, and hover a little.
[22:41] <Codex> "That's actually really fucking cool."
[22:41] <@Dorian> The nearest tavern is the gay Kobold brothel. After that, it's the Kobold's Head, because booze.
[22:41] <Spirit> "Gotta blastibitz tu, for blowin up stoof."
[22:42] <Codex> "Well hopefully you won't need to show us that bit."
[22:42] <Furious> I walk into the brothel, turn around and walk out again, without stopping. I then proceed to the Kobold's Head
[22:42] <Spirit> "Howp not. Hurty. Fun tho."
[22:44] <Codex> "Let's go get some drinks then," I say, setting off in search of the Kobold's Head.
[22:46] <Spirit> I vanish in a puff of purple smoke, reappearing in the air outside. Then, to fly! "Ehehehehehee!"
[22:46] <GameCrazed> I sigh and begin to follow.
[22:49] <@Dorian> After some time, you manage to find the IRS office. In Stormreach. Yet you're somehow still in Sharn.
[22:49] <Codex> "What."
[22:50] <Spirit> I use my telepathic implants to message him. "If yu stil alive, wis at der pub. Duno were yu ar."
[22:50] <@Dorian> The Kobold, on the other hand, has found the pud, and everyone has followed him. Because yes.
[22:51] <Spirit> "Bruvver wurk at der ovver pub, si. Towld me were dis wun is."
[22:51] <Codex> I set off in search again. Loudly thinking "Please help."
[22:53] <@Dorian> You manage to get to the correct pub. Ish.
[22:54] <Codex> "Hello?"
[22:54] <Codex> "I think I accidentally."
[22:55] <Furious> I wave at Penny and beckon him to the table that we are all sitting at
[22:56] <Codex> "That was a wild ride, shall I get the next round?"
[22:56] <@Dorian> The maid shows up with beers prepped and her top VERY low cut.
[22:57] <Furious> I press my ear against her breasts
[22:58] <Codex> "Whelp, that's the 4th one we're getting booted out of."
[22:58] <Codex> "What's next?"
[22:58] <@Dorian> The maid giggles and slaps you away. "Oh, stop it, you!"
[22:59] <Spirit> "Duno. Not thort dat far ahed."
[23:00] *** Dergimil (Dergimil@sux-BE4476C.aztw.cable.virginmedia.com) joined
[23:01] <@Dorian> Suddenly, your duelist friend appears out of thin air next to you in the pub. He probably faded out of the crowd, but who knows?
[23:02] <Codex> "Hey, got any plans for today?"
[23:02] <Codex> "I think we should go hunting for relics and shit."
[23:03] <Spirit> "Yeh. Lossa tresur?"
[23:03] <Dergimil> Bursts through the door shouting in an incomprehensible mess of words and shit, his tone deepening as he closes onto his fellow companions, he stops a paper's width away from Ken and whispers into his ear "I'm back, nyugga".
[23:03] <Codex> "I-"
[23:04] <Codex> "Alright,"
[23:04] <Dergimil> "What the toss did I miss then, anything important?"
[23:04] <@Dorian> A group of large men with dark skin fade out of the crown, "WHAT DID YOU SAY!?"
[23:04] <Dergimil> "Probably not, the balls is this relics rubbish you gibbering on about"
[23:05] <Dergimil> "The fuck do you want, coalskin?"
[23:05] <Furious> I exit the building attempting to not associate myself with the racist. I proceed to look for some kind of notice board to find a quest
[23:05] <Spirit> "Yus deel wif dem. Wi gun find shinis." Sensing incoming trouble, I begin quietly a-charging my laser.
[23:06] <Codex> "Well, I like gold, you like gold, we gold. I'm sure there'll be some perilous chasm to dive into that some mage wants a mcguffin from."
[23:07] <Dergimil> "Other than your mother? Sounds good"
[23:07] <@Dorian> They all pull large swords, "THE FUCK ARE YOU CHATTING, BOY!? YOU WANT I SHOULD SHOVE MY DIRK UP YO ASS!?"
[23:07] <Codex> "We could ask some of the proffessors." I finish talking, hoping nothing starts with the other bar patrons.
[23:07] <GameCrazed> I quikly exit the building, following the swordsman.
[23:08] <Codex> I stand up and get out.
[23:08] <Spirit> I quickly divert all power to my getting-the-fuck-out-of-dodge module.
[23:10] <Furious> I re-enter the tavern and pick up the disgusting racist. "Sorry folks, this guy had one too many"
[23:10] <Dergimil> "Don't you touch me you bloody fool!"
[23:11] <Furious> I jump out of the exit
[23:12] <@Dorian> You manage to pick the disgusting racist with relative ease. He's now restrained relatively well.
[23:12] <@Dorian> BOING!!!!!!
[23:12] <@Dorian> The sound resounds around the area as you leap a tall building in a single bound.
[23:13] <Dergimil> Looks back at the crowd and starts regurgitatiing various colours from his mouth towards the crowd.
[23:13] <Spirit> I activate my rocket boots and follow. "Shal I nok him owt? He corsin trubul."
[23:14] <Dergimil> It slumps to the floor like he drank an odd mixtured slush puppie, then burbs.
[23:15] <Dergimil> Oh and I pass out.
[23:15] <Codex> "That's hot, let's find something to take from a tomb somewhere." I begin, once catching up with the party.
[23:16] <Furious> I say "Now that that's sorted out, let's go do a quest. I remember I saw something about some ghosts"
[23:17] <Spirit> "Agrid. Der mite be goblin rooins neer heer. Tak gold fur us?"
[23:18] <Codex> "Oh, ghosts? That could be fun."
[23:18] <Codex> "It'll be a good test for my new mechanism." I prod the crossbow over my back.
[23:18] <Spirit> "Gowst gold is ment to bi best gold."
[23:18] <Furious> "Yeah, it seemed pretty important. I mean it was highlighted in some kind of weird paint"
[23:19] <Furious> "Not any colour specifically"
[23:19] <Codex> "Red paint?"
[23:19] <Furious> "No, just all the colours."
[23:19] <Furious> "And none of them"
[23:19] <Furious> "Anywho, let's get going" I try to remember where the notice said to go
[23:19] <GameCrazed> I look at the swordsman and rais an eyebrow
[23:19] <Codex> "I really wish I understood that, you'll have to show me. Do you remember any relavent information?"
[23:19] <Codex> "Ahh, okay."
[23:20] <Codex> I follow the Swordsman, ready to go.
[23:20] <@Dorian> The notice didn't specify, but apparently, you are now who everyone is going to call.
[23:20] <Spirit> I nod. "Yeh. Mi kobold kamp famus for nomshrooms dat make yu see dat." I then follow.
[23:21] <Furious> Realising that I can't actually remember what the sign said, I beckon for the group to follow. "This way guys"
[23:22] <Dergimil> "AWAKEN!"
[23:23] <@Dorian> When you get back to the signs, they say the ghosts are in a little town just on the outskirts of Sharn.
[23:23] <Furious> I drop him and nearly soil myself
[23:23] <Codex> "Let's go to that little town on the outskirts then."
[23:23] <GameCrazed> "What could possibly go wrong?"
[23:23] <Spirit> "Gud plan. Wi need geer?"
[23:24] <Dergimil> Lifts himself off the floor and shakes off the dirt from his elegant clothing, glaring at the jumping bastard that stole him from his entertainment.
[23:25] <Furious> I jump in the direction of the small town, assuming it's the correct one
[23:25] <Furious> I shake my head as I fly into the air
[23:26] <Codex> "I don't think we'll need to prepare a lot, we have magic."
[23:26] <Codex> "If all else fails, you can teleport."
[23:26] <@Dorian> As you head straight for the town, you realise that Sharn is a flying town.
[23:26] <Codex> "Let's follow the rabbit guy."
[23:26] <@Dorian> And you just jumped off the edge.
[23:26] <@Dorian> AGAIN.
[23:26] <Codex> "Let's not follow.
[23:27] <Codex> "Okay, does anyone know Slowfall?"
[23:27] <Codex> "Faster please,
[23:27] <Spirit> I realise I have rocket boots, activate them, and laugh at those who can't fly.
[23:27] <Codex> "FASTER."
[23:28] <Codex> The air elemental up my sleeve expands and attempts to lower me to the ground over time.
[23:29] <Codex> The elemental then goes around picking up any stragglers and scrubs that don't have slow fall.
[23:30] <Dergimil> >scrubs
[23:33] <@Dorian> As you touch down in the shitty little village, you see just how awful it is.
[23:33] <@Dorian> Also abandoned. And full of mist.
[23:33] <Dergimil> I CAST COLOR SPRAY.
[23:33] <Dergimil> void.
[23:34] <@Dorian> It's called "Nola Dillente"
[23:34] <Dergimil> I cast Dancing Lights.
[23:35] <@Dorian> A series of lights shows up in mid air, illuminating the area around you. You can now see through the mist a bit more.
[23:35] <Spirit> I refresh my vision augmentations, and look around.
[23:35] <@Dorian> The town is dark. You are likely to be eaten by a Grue.
[23:36] <Dergimil> Detect Thoughts on the party.
[23:40] <Spirit> "Rood to stair. Peeple get put on fiur for dat."
[23:41] <Furious> I attempt to look through the mist using the help of the dancing lights
[23:43] <Codex> "Well guys, look out for grues and let's find our objective."
[23:43] <Dergimil> I cast True Seeing on myself.
[23:45] *** Spirit quit (Connection reset by peer)
[23:45] <GameCrazed> I send my floating hand out to investigate.
[23:45] *** Spirit (Spirit@sux-9793A6AE.as13285.net) joined
[23:47] <Dergimil> He lowers his voice and speaks in proximity to the party "There's slim outlines moving about out there, they don't look too friendly either".
[23:47] <Codex> "All around us or in a direction?"
[23:49] <Furious> I enter the hunter's sense stance
[23:49] <GameCrazed> I wisper to the party "There all around us. In a circle".
[23:49] <Dergimil> "All around it seems, ready your steel".
[23:49] <Codex> I draw my crossbow as my elementals stand on either side of me.
[23:50] <Dergimil> I turn to face the party, and cast Clairvoyance 10 feet above the party.
[23:50] <Spirit> Watching my allies draw their weapons, I decide on the only logical option. I catch fire. "Der wi go."
[23:51] <GameCrazed> "They are all ghosts and they are semi-physical, partially on the etheral plane. All have battle staves".
[23:52] <Codex> "... They were armed and ready."
[23:52] <GameCrazed> "They are coming for us!"
[23:52] <Dergimil> "You're right there pal, they're incoming fast and all"
[23:53] <Furious> My body slowly becomes made of elemental earth, as I toughen my resistance
[23:54] <Codex> "Steadfast or Run?"
[23:55] <Dergimil> Snaps out of his clairvoyance, and franticly replies "Bugger this noise let's bolt out of here!"
[23:55] <Spirit> I whisper a brief word, activating my speech modulators. "Stand doun, gosts. Wes not afrayed to kil yu... agen!"
[23:55] <Codex> "Right behind you,"
[23:56] <Furious> "Guys... we should get out of here."
[23:56] <Furious> "Run! I'll cover you"
[23:56] <@Dorian> The ghosts keep advancing
[23:57] <Codex> I attempt to throw a Bears endurance Enhancement on on the Swordsman.
[23:58] <Codex> "Ethergaunts!"
[23:58] <Codex> "MOVE!"
[23:58] <Dergimil> I RUN OUT OF THERE AS FAST AS MY EXPEDITIOUS RETREAT TAKES ME.
[23:59] <@Dorian> You cannot run away, they're all around. Except for up.
[23:59] <GameCrazed> I cast Air walk and run the hell outta there!
[23:59] <Dergimil> ...FUck.
[23:59] <Codex> my Air elemental grows back to its larger size and attempts to scoop up as many people as it can.
[00:00] <Spirit> Once again, my decision to cut off my feet and replace them with small explosives proves the logically best choice. I fly up.
[00:00] <@Dorian> One of the Ethergaunts shoots the flying man in the back somehow, for nigh-on negligible damage.
[00:00] <Furious> I move slowly backwards as I am grabbed up by the elemental
[00:00] <Codex> The elemental scoops up The Dualist, The Swordsman and the Crossbowman, then shoots upwards into the air, above the fog.
[00:01] <Furious> "Come on you baAAAAAAAAAAAH!"
[00:01] <Dergimil> Looks back at the ghosts and start regurgitatiing various colours from his mouth towards them.
[00:04] <Codex> "Swordsman."
[00:04] <Dergimil> "I think I might have watered my undergarments, I haven't seen anything so horrifying in my life"
[00:05] <Codex> "We need to double and triple check any 'quests' we accept from now on."
[00:05] <Furious> "It was painted in attractive paint, how could I refuse"
[00:05] <GameCrazed> "I'd hit you if I didn't value my hands".
[00:06] <Spirit> "Wi culd jus blast um from up ere."
[00:06] <Codex> "I think they could blast us harder."
[00:06] <Codex> "Do you have anything big enough to hurt them? I don't."
[00:07] <Spirit> "Dey gots raynjud atak?"
[00:07] <Codex> "Ethergaunts are powerful casters, who fight in large numbers."
[00:07] <Codex> "They're very resistant to spells too."
[00:08] <GameCrazed> "That would have hurt if I cared about my spine".
[00:08] <Spirit> "Dey risystunt to blasty arrm blastur?"
[00:08] <Codex> "Find out, but don't get close."
[00:10] <Codex> "... I think I wet myself also."
[00:11] <Spirit> I fire a large blast of energy, coating a large circle on the ground. Nothing of interest happens.
[00:12] <@Dorian> After some time, you get back to Wizard University, just in time for your summonners - I mean internal monologues - to disspear off to do their things.
[00:12] <Codex> "We should report this."
[00:13] <Furious> "My intnernal monologue needs to rest, someone else go do it"

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DorianCreed
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