Battle Report

Info - This is a battle report of a game of Inquisitor that we played at the weekend

I got my mission from the sergeant in the morning. It seemed simple enough - go to this waste storage place, pick up a book that was left at the entrance, and get out. They told me there'd be no problems, nobody was after the book, there were no sentry guns, and no survivors in the station. So I signed out of Epsilon Base 15, and started walking towards the station. Didn't take much with me, and I went alone. Just grabbed a las-gun, bayonet, and a few grenades.

I started walking towards the base, climbing around and over towering rock pillars, walking through the burnt-out shells of buildings. The never-ending wind, flecked with sand and dust kept stinging my eyes, so when I saw the base, I breathed an audible sigh of relief. There were piles of yellow barrels behind a pipe to the north of me - they were to be a distraction when I grabbed the book.

I walked forward, around one of the pillars, getting closer to the entrance, when I saw movement off to my left. I spun and took a look at the person running towards the xeno-forest. He was tall, with dark skin, and few clothes. I couldn't tell if he had a gun, but I saw a large shield, and some form of shock weapon in his hand. I don't think he saw me then, but I still dropped and crawled behind a fallen rock pillar. I kept crawling so I was opposite the tall stranger, and watched him as he searched for something. He ran up to a bridge-like structure, and began to look there, so I assumed he was also after the book.

I flicked my gun onto single-shot mode, and lined the las-gun up with the stranger. I squeezed the trigger twice, sending two las-shots speeding towards the man. The first shot hit him in his left arm, bringing a shout of pain from him. The second shot thudded into him, just above his waist, and knocked him to the floor. He howled with rage, and stood up, before running straight for me. I panicked and shot six more shots at him, knocking him once more to the ground, and decorating the sand with his blood.

He stood up, and with another bellow of rage, smashed into me, and lunged at me with some sort of flail. I parried the blows, despite being trapped between two of the rock pillars. He bellowed again, as I jumped away from him, and smashed at me again. I made a frantic dodge to the right, parried the second blow, but was then caught by a succession of blows that knocked me to the ground.

I resisted against his onslaught of beatings for long enough to get out a grenade, and hold it in front of me. I was planning to threaten him with it, but he had other ideas. With a slap, he primed the grenade! I was left with a primed grenade with unknown fuse time. So I did the only thing I could. I stuck it to his crotch, and crawled away. I'd made it about three metres before I heard a ripping noise that made me turn around. I saw the stranger smile, and the last thing I saw was him throwing the grenade towards me.

Now please, will you let me go? I've told you my story, please... release my spirit to the emperor! Please... please... release me...

Ah ok here it is---

Here I lie, beaten and broken on the rocks, blood spilling from my wounds as I think to myself, why did I take this last mission? I had enough to make a home for my family; I suppose it was greed, just a little insurance money. But it seemed so… easy.

I was told I needed to find an artefact for my employer, I don’t know his name, I doubt most of his minions do, he just gave me my shield and shock maul. I was told it was a book and I must find it with utmost haste as agents of the imperium where also looking for it. I knew it was in the area but not where, I set out on my search for the relic.

I could see an industrial pipe line in the distance, with barrels stacked up behind it. There were towering rock spires in the distance and a strange forest, ethereal trees glowing white in the dusk lying in front of me. I set out towards the forest; a book of such properties may be kept in such a strange place? I ran towards the forest and leaned against a tree for support after the run. I looked and searched the ground upon the hillock but could find no trace of the book; I turned to survey the surroundings from my slight vantage point.

I could still see the spires in the distance but now, without the cover of the trees I could see a metal bridge, seemingly useless in this barren wasteland, I decided this would be my next destination, a feeling of anxiety washed over me as I realised I needed to find the boom quickly. I set off at a run towards the bridge.

As I reached the bridge I could see nothing underneath it so I checked on top. Nothing there either. It was at this point I noticed movement in the spires in the distance, before I knew it; energy bolts were flying towards me from some unseen enemy. The first flew into my left arm, producing a howl of pain as the bolt seared into my skin. The next flew into my chest, just above my waist and I was knocked to the ground, howling in pain as another bolt burned its signature hole in my stomach.

I jumped up, rage flowing through me like a pulsing rhythm of hate as I realised why this man must be here, for the relic! I charged towards him, seeing him to be a feeble guardsman who quaked in terror as I pounded at him in a blind rage. He shot six more shots at me in desperation, knocking me to the ground once more. I shrugged off these shots, fuelled as I was by my burning hate for this little man, I charged into him, bludgeoning him with my shock maul. At my frustration he parried each strike with the barrel of his gun.

The guardsman dodged backwards as I began my next assault, I was now in a state of absolute rage, I began pummelling him into the ground with my maul, I struck him again and again and blood began to seep from his wounds. In desperation he managed to pull out a grenade which I slapped away with disgust, how dare he try to stop me! I didn’t notice that when I had slapped it and his hand had been smacked against the floor, the grenade I saw, too late, was live.

His eyes lit up as he realised this and I only realised why when he smacked the grenade to my crotch! The glue instantly bonded with my flesh and I howled in agony as the scumbag rolled away to safety. Despite the blinding pain, I ripped the grenade from its current position and with a mad glint in my eye; I launched it towards his feeble body. The grenade met its target and blew him into tatters of flesh and guts, only an agent of the Dark Eldar could possibly have resurrected him from that fate. As the explosion racked his body, I noticed something at his belt, more grenades! At first the photon grenade exploded, making my normal eye blind and giving a sinister ringing in my ears as I watched the events unfold in complete silence. The next to be triggered was the EMP device, my bionic eye shorted out violently, causing a massive electric shock to my face. Now blind, I stumbled and felt my body being lifted onto the rocks by a massive force, the last krak grenade must have triggered.

So here I am, my normal eye has gained the power of sight again and my hearing must be coming back slowly, the effects of the grenades are wearing off. I can hear footfalls in the distance, dark blue spiky boots, who are these people, what do they want with me? What do you wan….