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Where do I begin?

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Post by Ketran Sat Feb 18, 2012 6:12 pm

So I wrote a short monologue around two years ago, from the mind of a survivor in an apocalyptic, zombie infested world. I've rarely shared it before, and I thought I'd get the expert opinion of you guys, my peers. It's only short so don't expect a tl;dr. Here it is.


Where do I begin? I know, that’s not exactly an enticing or interesting beginning to a story, but in my present condition it’s the best I can think of. Well I guess I should start with my name, I suppose if someone is reading this they’ll want to know the authors identity. My name is Rick, just Rick; my last name isn’t exactly of any importance, and besides I think I may have forgotten it. That makes me smile, it has only been a few months since the outbreak, has it been months? Is that it? It feels like years from where I’m sitting.

But anyway however long it has been, I seem to have forgotten my true identity; pathetic, I might be insane. I don’t know anymore, nothing really matters, even now as I sit here scrawling this almost illegible script, I can hear them. Screaming, bashing and raging for no coherent reason. They are trying to get in you see, and this time there will be no saviour for me, no secret concealed exit, there’s no way out this time, this room will surely be my tomb. Isn’t it funny how it ends? This ‘Haven’ I once called my safe house is soon to be ironically the scene of my demise. I pray they do it quickly, lest my last memory be that of pain and suffering.

I wouldn’t like my life to end that way, I wouldn’t like it to end at all. But in truth I’m finding it hard to grasp reasons to live on, I’ve already lost my life’s greatest treasure; and in this current present, existing is a brutal and horrific ordeal. I have seen things that cannot be unseen, memory imprints have scarred my mind, and I can never forget what has transpired in this living hell that my world has become. It makes the tranquillity of death all the more inviting. I would love to sleep right now, lie down in a comfy bed; close my eyes and dream in a time long gone when I felt the very fibres of my soul radiating with pure joy and bliss.

All that faces me now however, is a dirty blank wall, a rotten, beaten, chewed mattress. A life spent too long in solitude has brought me to this edge, so now I have a choice, no matter what I do will result in the continuation of my pathetic, lonely life; so I must decide. The gun lying next to me has one magazine left, that’s six bullets. I can kill six of them with this gun, and that is only if my wearied eyes can guide the barrel to its target. Six out of thousands is not enough. It is simply prolonging the gruesome inevitable fate that awaits me; and so I come to the second choice. I can take that inviting, warm weapon, and I can put its maw to the side of my head. Then I can gently pull that comfortable, loving trigger and everything that was and could have been will disappear in a cloud of ashen smoke, and a loud abrupt bang.

I suppose before I make that decision, I should finish my story, or begin it depending on the way you see it. It would be unfair to write a monologue about myself, and not tell you the events that transpired some months ago. Well, I suppose; here I go…

Tell me what you think Smile

P.S: Personally the name is just a place-holder, it's subject to change.
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Post by Twilightwings Sat Feb 18, 2012 11:46 pm

...This was lovely Very Happy
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Post by Ketran Sun Feb 19, 2012 1:25 pm

Cheers! Very Happy
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Post by Twilightwings Mon Feb 20, 2012 3:42 pm

So when is the next part being made? Very Happy
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Post by Ketran Mon Feb 20, 2012 9:00 pm

Next month two years ago. Ha, I find it very difficult to stick to any kind of story; I fear that adding something to one finished and perfected piece of work will ruin it. I did do a chapter 1, but it wasn't great, it's somewhere on my computer still, but I wouldn't rate it next to this.
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Post by Twilightwings Tue Feb 21, 2012 4:34 pm

Upload it anyways, I'd read just about anything xD
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Post by Ketran Tue Feb 21, 2012 6:25 pm

Perhaps I will, I wish more people would come and offer an opinion on this though. You're the only one who's bothered to take a look Neutral
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Post by DorianCreed Tue Feb 21, 2012 7:02 pm

Bothered to post, not bothered to take a look. I read it, thought it was fucking brilliant, but agree with you that it is nicely self contained. Something that works well on it's own shouldn't need a sequel. It should just stand alone, being fucking awesome. Like this.
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Post by Ketran Tue Feb 21, 2012 9:41 pm

Cheers dude, means a lot to hear such compliments. Very Happy

I've published this to my Elfwood account too, no luck there though. Jewels need to be excavated I suppose.
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